Tim Torkildson's Clown Alley

The Poet Laureate of the New York Times Newsroom

Tuesday, May 31, 2016

If you're old and homeless

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If you're old and homeless there is something you can do to improve your station and obtain a better view. Just think a happy thought ...

The Poor

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(Mathew 26:11) When Jesus proclaimed that the poor Would be with us forevermore, Does that justify The hungry child’s cry Or havi...

A journalist's life is so hard

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A journalist's life is so hard; they constantly must be on guard for lies and deceit, or better news beat -- no wonder they drink li...
Sunday, May 29, 2016

The price of a blowout wedding in 1947? A staggering $2,500

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A wedding is not inexpensive; making the man rather pensive. He pays to be wed, then just might be bled for a divorce that's extensi...

Baylor Demotes President Kenneth Starr Over Handling of Sex Assault Cases

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In college the students aren't stones; Besides paying off student loans, they dream about sex and all its effects. Even a saint has ...
Saturday, May 28, 2016

None of us want tomorrow

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"The fact of the matter is none of us want tomorrow . . . "  Jeffrey R. Holland.   Tomorrow is a looming dread so often, tha...
Wednesday, May 25, 2016

Don Rickles

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Comics mature awful slowly; but this one was like the E. coli. One night was enough for him to rebuff your self esteem like a coarse goa...

Covenants

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Alma 56:8 --      But I would not suffer them that they should break this covenant   which they had made, supposing that God would strengthe...
Tuesday, May 24, 2016

Forbidden wine is very sweet

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Alma 55:10 -   But  Laman  said  unto  them:  Let  us  keep  of  our  wine  till  we  go  against  the  Nephites  to  battle.  But  this  s...
Monday, May 23, 2016

I'd like to see you, now and then

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I'd like to see you, now and then, whenever you're in town; I'd like to know you think of me as more than just a clown. A hand...
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Tim Torkildson
I am convinced that if God meant man to laugh, he would have made more Democrats.
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