Tim Torkildson's Clown Alley

The Poet Laureate of the New York Times Newsroom

Wednesday, September 25, 2019

Verses from Stories in the New York Times -- The World’s Oceans Are in Danger, Major Climate Change Report Warns -- A Love Letter to Canned Food -- Employer Health Insurance Is Increasingly Unaffordable, Study Finds.

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One fish, two fish, no fish, few fish. Dead fish, whew! fish, black fish, screw fish. This one poisoned by phosphates. That one sw...

Verses from Stories in Today's Washington Post -- A steamy chat distracted an officer when she entered the wrong apartment and killed a man, prosecutors say -- A masterpiece hung above a woman’s hot plate for years. It could be worth millions. -- An acclaimed French chef is suing over a lost Michelin star. It all started with a cheesy allegation..

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Let this cop's sad story be part of our stored memory. She was so consumed by lust she became a bit nonplussed, and distract...

For they shall be comforted

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And again, blessed are all they that  mourn , for they shall be  comforted 3 Nephi 12:4. Mournful are the days of man, comfortle...
Tuesday, September 24, 2019

Verses from Stories in Today's New York Times -- Trump Blames Europe for His Delay of Ukraine Aid -- Orlando Officer Is Terminated After Arresting 6-Year-Olds -- Boris Johnson’s Suspension of Parliament Was Unlawful, U.K. Supreme Court Rules.

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Miser Trump blames Europe for his petty pocketbook. He thinks if he is generous he'll look just like a schnook. He wants the ...

Verses from Stories in Today's Washington Post -- Samsung’s Galaxy Fold is finally here. Handle with care. -- A revenge-seeking fitness expert created 369 fake Instagram accounts and staged a kidnapping -- An Iowa hog farmer said his wife fell on a corn rake. A jury ruled he used it to murder her.

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I never knew I needed folding phones so desperately. It seems my life is incomplete without one instantly. I don't know where I...

The poor in spirit

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  Yea, blessed are the  poor in spirit  who  come  unto me, for theirs is the kingdom of heaven. 3 Nephi 12:3 Come unto me is the...
Monday, September 23, 2019

Verses from Stories in the Washington Post -- Shut Down D.C.: ‘Climate rebels’ shut down intersections across the District -- She left a can of dry shampoo in her car. It blasted a hole through the roof. -- Trump says he is worthy of a Nobel Prize ‘for a lot of things’ — but isn’t treated fairly.

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What do climate rebels want, as their banners they do flaunt? Cleaner air, no greenhouse gas? Carbon footprints made of glass? A...

Verses from Headlines in the New York Times -- The Urgent Search for a Cyber Silver Bullet Against Iran -- Closing My Curtains for Xi Jinping and His Grand Parade -- Tour Operator Thomas Cook Collapses.

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The soldiers in their barracks laze as we approach the Cyber Days when algorithms fight our wars with nerds who fill up all our cor...

Establishing Peace

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. . .   and that which shall be written by the fruit of thy loins, and also that which shall be written by the fruit of the loins of Juda...
Sunday, September 22, 2019

It’s a Fact: Mistakes Are Embarrassing the Publishing Industry. (NYT)

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I like to scribble poetry; there isn't any stress on whether someone wears a gown or just a simple dress. And since it's fre...
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Tim Torkildson
I am convinced that if God meant man to laugh, he would have made more Democrats.
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