Monday, July 3, 2017

Restaurant Review: Sonic, on State Street in Provo

The ubiquitous Sonic is beyond the ken of critics, just like McDonald's and KFC. There's nothing to write about the food itself, only the experience of dining there. Whether this kind of food is poisonous or neutral is a debate that will not become morally clear for perhaps another century. By then we may very well be wishing for the 'good old days' when a cheap burger and crispy french fries were available at all.

I never see any beat up old jalopies at the Sonic drive through window -- either trailer trash can't afford eating there, or it's primarily one of middle class America's most endemic vices.


To me, the sheer volume of menu choices is daunting. I become indecisive, terrified that if I order one good thing to eat I'm going to miss out on another equally good or better item. Sometimes I dream of winning the Lotto and then coming here with all my friends and ordering every stinking thing on the menu, so I can sample it and my pals can clean it up after me.


Of course at Sonic if you don't have a car you dine al fresco


Just push the big red button and place your order. I ordered the Breakfast Burrito Supreme, with a limeade.


Here comes my order now. It only took 'em 7 minutes


Not too shabby.


Can someone explain to me what 'old fashioned' means in this context? I mean fry sauce has only been around for, what, less than twenty years?


Hey look! I get a mint in my bag. That's classy.



If you look closely you'll see I had 76 cents in change -- but I paid with my debit card. So what gives? I didn't get no stinkin' change. This is flummery!


When Utah votes for a 15 dollar minimum wage I'll go to work at Sonic



Headlines & Verse. Monday. July 3. 2017

REFUGEES SHUN THE U.S. AS OUR EVIL REPUTATION SENDS THEM TO SAFER HAVENS


Trump makes the U.S. so haunting
That refugees find us too daunting.
They’ll try Mexico,
And not Chicago

(our murder rates we should keep flaunting . . . )


FREEDOM OF THE PRESS UNDER ATTACK IN AMERICA. SO WHAT ELSE IS NEW? 


The Press likes to think it’s unique
In not being able to speak
The truth anymore --
But there are a score

Of those who prefer the oblique



If I were a rabbit this year
I might be inclined to adhere
To packing some heat,
To make the punks fleet
When they make a grab at my ear.



NABISCO EXPERIMENTS WITH OREO MAKEOVER -- ARE THERE NO STANDARDS LEFT IN THE WORLD?


They’re messin’ with the Oreo -- although they say they’re not.
This really gets my goat and ties my stomach in a knot.
Who are they to tinker with a cookie so complete
That all you need is milk to be ecstatically replete?
Experiment with anything you like, but if you change
A single crumb of Oreo your face I’ll rearrange!



NEW STUDY FINDS YOUNG MEN WOULD RATHER PLAY VIDEO GAMES THAN FIND A JOB 

Our video games are so cool
They keep our young men out of school --
They spend ev’ry day
At video play,

And won’t get wet in the job pool.



Sunday, July 2, 2017

Photo Essay: Potluck at the Bishop's House. Provo.

We start our Sunday services late, and don't get out until 5:30 in the evening. Since today was Fast Sunday, the Bishop invited everyone in the Ward over for a potluck tonight at 6.

There was pink lemonade and cupcakes made from scratch


Happy Ward members among the overgrown bushes


Kids goofing off for the camera


Sometimes Mormons can smile a leeeetle too much . . . 


What would the LDS Church be without young married couples deeply in love?


Waiting for the watermelon


The Bishop worries: Are there enough tortilla chips?


This baby is thinking: "Hey, let me at that guacamole dip!" 


"That's a good point, dear"


At an LDS feed there's always plenty for everybody


Let's get another look at those cupcakes . . .


A potluck is always a good place to try out some new headgear. Just call me Captain Peachfuzz.

Headlines & Verse. Sunday. July 2. 2017

EUROPEAN CITIES BANISH TOURISTS THIS SUMMER. WILL THE BIG APPLE FOLLOW SUIT?


A tourist who visited Venice
Was thrown out of town as a menace.
“You’re ruining our space!”
They said to his face --

“The San Pantalon ain’t for tennis!”


EVEN PIRATES HAVE TO BEHAVE THEMSELVES IN THESE SENSITIVE TIMES. DISNEY TO REVAMP ICONIC 'PIRATES OF THE CARIBBEAN' RIDE 


Walt Disney thought pirates were game.
Today they just have to be lame.
They can’t take a wench
Into their foul clench --

Nor can they set cities aflame.



When packing a bag for a flight
I like to take books that are light.
Not porn -- something clean;
Like MAD Magazine.
Not newspapers -- they are just trite.



WILL FERRELL LOBS ANOTHER BOMB AT THE AMERICAN PUBLIC WITH HIS LATEST FILM -- 'THE CASINO.' WHY DOESN'T HOMELAND SECURITY DO SOMETHING ABOUT HIM? 

Will Ferrell makes movies like custard --
In which he has added some mustard.
The taste is unique --
It’s not a technique

That keeps viewers seated and clustered.


Photo Essay: Where I Live

Where I live is at Valley Villas Senior Housing -- 650 West 100 North -- in Provo, Utah. I have been here for about 2 years. Before living here I stayed in a friend's unheated basement storage room. The building is owned and run by the Provo City Housing Authority. Rent is based on income. I pay $249.00 a month, which includes $25 a month for cable, which I don't use but have to pay anyway. Utilities are free. The place was built in 1995.

                                           You need a key to get inside the building itself.

I spend most of my time in this recliner in my living room -- I'm in it right now, putting this photo essay together. Before I was able to get a bed, this is where I slept at night as well.


                                               I'm on the ground floor, apartment 115


This is my patio -- regulations only allow 2 chairs outside


This is the view from my patio


My bedroom


My bathroom



My kitchen



My storage closet


My laundry room. Washers are $1.00. Dryers are 50 cents.




The main lobby


The community room, where we have a brief LDS Sacrament Meeting each Sunday



The garbage chute is on the third floor


The third floor also has a computer room, installed by Google. But the computers keep getting ripped out. Right now we're down to two.



I'm grateful for my little apartment. When I was raising a family I bought houses in North Dakota, Kansas, and finally Minneapolis. But I guess I'll never own a home again. Or live in a motor home or on a train again, like I did with the circus. Or rent a three bedroom bungalow with my beautiful partner in Thailand again. This place is as final as it gets, for me. I'm thinking this will be my home until I am called Home.



The Polished Soul



Henry B. Eyring


My soul began its journey here as jagged as a rock;
Awkward angles, edges sharp -- yet dull as forceless chalk.
It would not take a polish nor hold up to heat and cold.
Twas not a thing of beauty, but a piece of punk fool’s gold.
The years have blunted many barbs; and tears dissolved the crust.
Yet heartache packed the rubble firm, with ev’ry unfair thrust.
And now perhaps a sparkle may at last come from my soul,

As Jesus starts to polish it and make it sound and whole.