Sea Lice and Salmon

In recent years, however, the wild salmon population has more than halved, partly because of the spread of sea lice, parasites that feast on the mucus and skin of the fish before moving on to the muscle and fat, making the fish vulnerable to infections and sometimes killing them. From the NYTimes.

I’m reading about sea lice and quite suddenly I find

My innards are reacting with a most peculiar grind.

This parasitic critter that infests the seven seas

Preys upon the salmon, which I used to eat with ease.

But when I see a photo of that sucking parasite

I start to wonder what I’m getting when some lox I bite.

And how about that sushi that the supermarket hawks --

How much of it might carry just a tad of sea louse pox?

I know I’m being squeamish, but at my age you’d be too --

If you thought a salmon steak might give you stomach flu.

So Norway I regret to say, although I am a fan

Of salmon, from now on I’ll stick with tuna in a can!

Instant Ramen Noodle Review: Tongkotsu Ramen. Sapparo Ichiban brand.

This morning's instant ramen noodles are made in the USA -- although the packaging is labeled in Japan. (I can't figure that one out, either.) It requires boiling for 3 minutes before adding the chicken flavor packet. I'm going to add some black beans for body and substance. No egg this morning -- I had a cheese omelette last night. Hey, I forgot . . . I've got a couple of elderly white mushrooms loitering in the fridge -- chopped up, in they go! 

The ramen was a success. Noodles firm. Broth savory. The addition of mushrooms was a stroke of genius on my part, if I do say so myself. The black beans . . . eh, not so much. White beans would go better. Navy beans.
Now I've got a pot to clean up -- that's the only downside, I reckon.

The Paradise Papers

A trove of 13.4 million records exposes ties between Russia and U.S. President Donald Trump’s billionaire commerce secretary, the secret dealings of the chief fundraiser for Canadian Prime Minister Justin Trudeau and the offshore interests of the queen of England and more than 120 politicians around the world.

The leaked documents, dubbed the Paradise Papers, show how deeply the offshore financial system is entangled with the overlapping worlds of political players, private wealth and corporate giants, including Apple, Nike, Uber and other global companies that avoid taxes through increasingly imaginative bookkeeping maneuvers.  From ICIJ.    

I have a little tax haven upon a tropic isle

Which keeps my money secret with a deep abiding guile.

So I can hold my head up midst the riff raff when I say

“I’m an honest person and am glad to pay my way.”

The little people should be taxed because they have no clue

What their money in this wicked world can really do.

They like to waste it on such things as charity and rights

For the dispossessed as they pursue their tedious flights.

And even if a leak should show a bit of hocus pocus,

My dummy corporations will keep me fully out of focus.

Indeed, I wear so many fiscal masks it’s hard to know

Which are for my bankers and which are for public show!

Why I Don't Travel Anymore

Why bother going round the globe in search of the quixotic,

When my apartment building offers so much that’s exotic?

For botanizing pleasure all I need’s the laundry room,

Where faulty drains are filled with mold and fungi’s vivid bloom.

Amidst this verdant splendor there are animals galore

That residents walk in the halls, where they can leave their spoor.

I’ve seen the nimble spider at his work near smoke detector,

And marveled at the dumpster divers sipping their sweet nectar.

And I could spend a lifetime on the study of the quirks

Belonging to the many tribes of janitors and clerks.

All the world’s within my view; I’ve little need to wander

To find all sorts of ambience on which to deeply ponder!  

I Miss Dave Moore

I miss Dave Moore. He did the news on WCCO TV in Minneapolis forever. I grew up knowing that anything Dave Moore said about Art Naftalin or Minnehaha Falls was the copper bottomed truth, and probably very important to my well being -- even though as a kid I had more pressing concerns to deal with, like where to play kickball when they were paving the streets or preserving my allowance to purchase the latest MAD magazine.

Dave Moore gave the local news with an earthy panache, as well as detail, that no longer seems to exist. I hope I’m wrong, but the local news that was a constant background chatter for me as a kid has disappeared -- or have I just gone hard of hearing?  

If you seek the local news, you’re seeking it in vain.

The local news is owned by corporations who will reign

Over your opinions and perceptions, but refuse

To give you anything that passes as your local news.

Newspaper or radio, or television station --

Local stories now have gone on permanent vacation.

City council meetings or a school board jamboree --

Thinking they’ll be covered by the news is fantasy.

Or if by chance they’re mentioned by the local fourth estate,

It’s only cuz there is a chance it will make good clickbait.

Our sense of neighborhood and of community is nil,

As algorithms manufacture nothing but warm swill.

The Silly Male Animal

“In many species, males tend to do somewhat stupid things that end up getting them killed in silly ways, and it appears that may have been true for mammoths also,” said Love Dalén, an evolutionary biologist from the Swedish Museum of Natural History.  From the NYTimes.

The mammoth was a mighty beast; his feet did shake the ground.

His trumpet roar was hideous and heard for miles around.

But when he tried to take a mate by stamping on the ice,

He sunk into the muddy ground and now sleeps with the gneiss.

The dinosaur had massive brawn, though cousin to the birds;

He could thrash and crash and mash opponents into curds.

But after making sure his mate had laid her eggs discrete,

He trampled on them tenderly -- and now is obsolete.

And so dumb beasts of male persuasion silly things will do.

That is why we like to watch them living in the zoo.

Human males are also prone to posturing unwise --

Will they too disappear for good beneath much better skies?

Christians feeding others to the lions nowadays

Christians feeding others to the lions nowadays

Should not be surprising but engender lots of praise.

Reactionary dogmatists protect our moral fiber

While they’re throwing liberals into the flowing Tiber.

It’s something of a hobby for the upright and sincere

To never flagellate themselves, but whip the cavalier.

For heaven will not tolerate diversity in thought;

Salvation must be merited (or maybe even bought.)

Let’s celebrate the Bible for its message crystal clear

That dissidents be crucified with hymns of godly cheer.

Sowing seeds of hatred is most surely not caprice

When you claim the backing of the gentle Prince of Peace.

In America, No Unions Need Apply

A week ago, reporters and editors in the combined newsroom of DNAinfo and Gothamist, two of New York City’s leading digital purveyors of local news, celebrated victory in their vote to join a union.

On Thursday, they lost their jobs, as Joe Ricketts, the billionaire founder of TD Ameritrade who owned the sites, shut them down.  From the NYTimes.

America the Pitiful is just a step away

From busting all the unions that get in the rich man’s way.

Like some feudal baron who thinks vassals are his right,

He punishes employees with his monetary might.

Guilds and labor unions are now under vicious siege

By the Lords of Wall Street who prefer noblesse oblige.

But trusting to the whims of plutocrats has never yet

Provided common workers with a decent safety net.

If you are considering a union membership

Just remember you are angling for that old pink slip.

The rich don’t have a union -- not as far as I can see.

But you can bet they all belong to this conspiracy!

Like the Red Queen in Alice, Trump Shouts "Off with their heads!"

The Red Queen in Alice roared “Off with their pates!”

In Washington Trump calls for similar fates

For ev’ry transgressor that he does assess

As causing Americans heavy distress.

To him judge and jury are useless at best.

He wants the bad guys to be guillotine’s guest.

He’s hoping and hopping for kangaroo courts,

Reviving old Rome’s bitter savage blood sports.

And when innocents get caught up in the mix,

He’ll send his regrets down the cold River Styx.

The right of due process, in his estimation,

No longer applies in our murderous nation.

Instant Noodle Review: Mama brand; shrimp flavored. From Thailand

So I bought a dozen different kinds of ramen-type noodles at the Asian Market here in Provo yesterday. Being a bachelor, I eat a lot of instant noodles -- so I wanted to compare them, see which, if any, are superior, and which, if any, are foul enough to avoid.

The package says to pour boiling water over the Mama noodles and let stand for three minutes. I'll add a raw egg to the dry noodles, along with some parsley and pickled carrots.

After it was done steeping, I put in a dash of lime juice and a squirt of fish sauce (which I put in just about everything except french toast.) I'm having a mug of chocolate soy milk with it.

The noodles kept their firmness, which made for a nice mouth feel. The broth was very good, but of course that may be because of the raw egg. The whole shebang only lacked for some scallions. This brand is extremely convenient, since I don't even have to dirty a pot to boil the noodles in -- just pour boiling water over 'em from my tea kettle. This is a brand I'll stock up on again. One package costs 49 cents.