From the New York Times.. Sunday March 11 2018

(These are paragraphs from the NYTimes -- the verse is mine)

Where others see flashing yellow lights
and slow down, Mr. Trump speeds up.
And just like that, in the course of 45
minutes in the Oval Office, Mr. Trump
threw aside caution and dispensed with
decades of convention to embark on a
daring, high-wire diplomatic gambit aimed
at resolving one of the world’s most
intractable standoffs.

There’s something about this here Trump --

Could he be a champ, not a chump?

Korea might find

He’s got a good mind --

Or else he might hit a speed bump.

A week after a retired Russian double agent
and his daughter were poisoned by a
nerve agent in the small city of Salisbury,
British authorities on Sunday asked anyone
who was near Mr. Skripal that day
to wash their clothes.

It’s dangerous to be a spy

Unless your clothes are drip-n-dry.

The poison that will come your way

Means you will have a toxic day;

Contaminates your shoes and socks,

Your eyeglasses and ticking clocks.

So if to allergies you’re prone,

Then get a job at Firestone.

The political establishment, as embodied
by the governing Institutional Revolutionary Party,
or PRI, which held power uninterrupted
from 1929 to 2000, is perceived by many
Mexicans as inclined to corruption and graft.

A young man who came from La Paz

Decided to alter the laws;

He made his attacks

Against corrupt hacks --

They found him stuffed inside a vase.

                  

From the Wall Street Journal. Sunday March 11 2018

                                              (All stories quoted are from today's edition)

China’s legislature formally scrapped term limits on
Xi Jinping’s presidency, clearing his path toward
indefinite one-man rule.

Term limits are such a dull bore.

They get in the way of the chore

To scorn and then crush

All this Liberty mush --

The Chinese appreciate gore.

American workers, for the first time, are discovering
how much employees earn at the biggest U.S.
companies and how that pay compares with
the chief executive’s.

So now that I know that my chief

Is making such money, the grief

And the rage are intense

That such recompense

Must go to that cold side of beef.

The White House is expected to release a plan on Sunday
that would urge states to consider raising the age to buy certain
firearms and would recommend that states allow school staffers
to carry concealed weapons, according to White House officials
who have been briefed on the proposal.

The janitor has got a gun, so when he empties trash

If he should spot a threat he can then shoot it all to smash.

And the ladies serving lunch are packing heat these days --

You never know when mashed potatoes might go on a craze.

Don’t mess with the librarian when down the hall you run --

That’s not a book she’s carrying, but a gatling gun.

So if in public schools you find yourself a student stuck,

Not only learn your ABC’s but also learn to duck!

“And after the angel had spoken unto us, he departed.”

“And after the angel had spoken unto us, he departed.”

First Nephi. Chapter Three. Verse 30.

The problem with angels is that

When finished with all their chitchat,

To heaven they fly

And leave us to try

To get their instructions down pat.

WSJ Addendum. Saturday, March 10. 2018

(Editor's Note: All stories quoted below are sourced from the Wall Street Journal)

Mr. Trump’s signing of new 25% tariffs on steel and 10% on aluminum
imports is poised to reshape the U.S. economy. It is the most significant
break in decades from the country’s traditional free-trade stance and has
threatened to widen a split within the ​Republican Party between an older
breed of internationalists and newer Trump supporters.

The tariff is coming -- egad!

It’s not just a whimsical fad.

The Party is split,

With half in a snit --

They’re hissing and spitting up plaid.

The European Union and Japan pressed the U.S. to exempt them from
President Donald Trump’s steel and aluminum tariffs on Saturday,
firing their opening salvos as officials seek to avoid a trade war with the
world’s biggest economy.

When Europe and Japan decide/to snub our Jekyll and our Hyde/
They’ll put up tariffs faster than/any plain old Superman.

If children in kindergarten can practice active-shooter drills,
then they can also walk out to call for safety, some parents and educators say.

A young boy decided to stray/away from his school one fine day/
when asked why he strayed/he said in First Grade/he wasn’t a student, but prey.

Supermarket Love

Supermarkets—those havens of the not-so-scintillating chore
of scouring numbered aisles, pushing carts and perusing produce—
are finding a new identity as a social hub in communities.
Parents now bring their children here to play, retirees gather for Bingo,
and singles find romance.  From the Wall Street Journal

I met her in the pasta aisle.

Attracted by her saucy smile,

I asked if she liked angel hair;

She said she’d buy some we could share.

We sampled cheese and garlic toast;

I kissed her by the strip loin roast.

She laid her head upon my chest

While pricing frozen chicken breast.

But then we quarreled o’er brussels sprouts,

so had to go our sep’rate routes.

And now I loiter by dry beans

And wonder just what true love means . . .

May the Peace of God rest upon you

. . . may the peace of God rest upon you . . .

Alma. Chapter 7. Verse 27.

Peace is very simple, though it’s also very rare.

It comes to me through simple things, if I but learn to care.

Cleaning in the chapel when the Bishop asks me to;

Calling on a neighbor who is feeling mighty blue;

Feeding missionaries and a temple session when

I’d rather take a nap or watch some Netflix in my den.

It isn’t formulaic or a cliche to believe

The peace of God comes slowly if to service I won’t cleave.

In one corner, Little Rocket Man. In the other, the Deranged Dotard.

A meeting of the misanthropes took place in gilded suite,

Where East and West did chew the fat, while dancing tweet to tweet.

The huddle was unplanned for; twas a twinge that threw a spark.

It hadn’t any gravitas -- its duration but a quark.

Gavels banged and shuffled papers gave the goobers there

A lucid explanation for their leaders’ ghastly hair.  

And so it came to pass that, lo, the very first decree

They acted on was killing all the barbers locally.

Then they had a dinner of roast hoodwink and boiled smirk,

Washed down with great bottles of the very best pure murk.

Next morning they talked turkey till they gobbled Jennie-O,

Deciding to build rockets that to Narnia would go.

But then, alas, the Dude of Dudes (or Dud of Duds, perhaps)

Ordered up some kimchi with proprietary apps.

This in turn did madden Sqaushy Face to such extent

He spun around in seungmu all his fury so to vent.

The Secret Service thought the dance was terroristic, so

They pulled out their bazookas and put on a noisy show.

When the smoke had cleared twas found that ev’ry chowderhead

Was blasted into jelly paste and probably was dead.

When the news reached Pyongyang and then Washington D.C.

They had the biggest party that the world will ever see.

And just to make things perfect all the kewpie dolls rebelled

And marched upon the NRA and ev’ry member felled.

Now at last the world’s at peace; the Pax Facebook holds sway --

The swords are beat to water pipes and bulls shout out ‘ole!’

a stone on my bed

a stone on my bed

does not sleep: does not wake up

it is and is not

Ledes & Limericks. Friday March 9 2018

Reporters with the East Bay Times and San Jose Mercury News rallied
in Oakland today to protest Alden Global Capital, the hedge fund
that owns their newspapers. According to the journalists, the investment
firm has made devastating cuts to newsrooms as it seeks higher returns.  From Hoodline

Most newsrooms are hollow today --

They’ve tossed good reporters away.

The bottom line rules;

Those left bet on pools

of who will go next and who’ll stay.

The consumption of a pint, typically considered four servings,
isn’t necessarily new. Ice cream is, for some, the ultimate comfort food
after breakups, taxing workdays or family fights.
More than half of Americans have consumed an entire pint
of ice cream in one sitting, according to a survey funded by Arctic Zero.
It found 41% felt guilty afterward and 10% felt physically ill.  From the Wall Street Journal

There was a young gal from Purdue

Who gobbled down ice cream, mon dieu!

When asked why she binged

Her answer was fringed

With sprinkles and fudge and cashew.

Shocking and yet somehow not surprising,
Mr. Trump’s decision to do what no other sitting president
has done and meet in person with a North Korean leader
reflects an audacious and supremely self-confident approach
to international affairs.  From the NYTimes

While giving the devil his due

It’s hard to imagine just who

Will benefit most

From this ersatz roast --

Trump’s ego or Olympic crew.

A Choice Land

...  yea, a land which is choice above all other lands.

First Nephi. Chapter Two. Verse 20.

This is the land that’s choice for me;

A land that’s meant for liberty.

It nurtures those who work it well;

It gives men hope to show and tell.

And here the noble virtues strive

to keep the sacred flame alive.

The flame that lights up all the earth,

That gives to all an equal worth.

Give me the strength, Almighty God,

This birthright never to defraud!