Tim Torkildson's Clown Alley

Thursday, May 31, 2018

the hidden beauty

of a thing interrupted

emerges slowly

the drifting daybreak

hints at more excellent things

for those with chaste eyes

Uganda passes tax law on social media users to discourage ‘gossiping’ online

Uganda’s parliament has passed a law to tax those

who use social media platforms like Facebook,

Twitter, Viber, and WhatsApp . . . The controversial

tax was first introduced by the country’s president,

Yoweri Museveni, who wrote a letter to the treasury

stating that social media encouraged gossip that was

costing Uganda time and income.

The tax will come into effect on June 1st, imposing a

200 shilling ($0.05) levy per day on those who use

social media platforms . . .

The Verge

Uganda has passed a fine law

For citizens who like to jaw

On internet sites

In large megabytes,

Neglecting their bricks without straw.

Wednesday, May 30, 2018

Private Charitable Foundations Give Lavish Rewards to Insiders

A mutual-fund manager earned nearly $5 million

over eight years from a lucrative side gig. He

was trustee of his business partner’s private

charitable foundation. Another charitable foundation,

set up by a carpet merchant, has millions of dollars

in loans outstanding to the man’s carpet company.

A third paid out more to companies owned by the

foundation president’s family than it gave to charity

in a recent year. WSJ

I dropped a coin into the cup of some poor soul today,

Standing on the corner like a pitiful old stray.

And straight away a fellow in Italian silk appeared.

“Don’t be a fool!” he said to me. “You’re acting mighty weird!”

He grabbed me by the arm and led me to a coffee shop,

And there he told me private charity was such a flop.

“The poor do not appreciate the finer things in life”

He said while spreading marmalade on muffins with a knife.

He then explained that charity is just another name

For gouging money from the suckers, like a carny game.

“I set up an endowment for some trendy thing” he crowed,

“And you should see the shekels that come in by the carload!”

“Once I have a bundle I begin to loan it out,

Or buy a hundred acres with a stream that’s full of trout.

I get away with murder cuz the tax laws are inept;

So if you are nonprofit, then the books are barely kept.”

“My brother takes a large slice, as a consultation fee;

My sister gets a hunk for serving us warm herbal tea.

And if there’s any leftovers, or crumbs we do not need,

We give it to somebody who has got a good newsfeed.”

My eyes were opened by this man’s approach to giving alms,

And I intend to get donations in my sticky palms.

For charity begins at home, but once you think expansion

Then you can keep on stealing till you’ve got yourself a mansion!

Tuesday, May 29, 2018

this is the color

of my hope for tomorrow

upon goodly hills

look up to grayness

looking down to the grayness

it tells no secrets

A letter from my missionary daughter in California

Hello everyone!!

We have had a busy week! And come to think of it, I don't think there's been a week that we haven't been busy, which is great. Now when it comes to remembering all the things we've done this week, that's a different story! We had transfers, and found out that both of us (Sister Peterson and I) are staying in Dana Point!! We are so excited to have another six weeks together, this area is really cool and there is so much work to be done. And we are both really musical, so we love to make music together!

We have dinner with members almost every night, which gives us a great chance to get to know the people here and this week we had dinner with a family by the last name of Brown. They're a couple in their 50s that manage medical offices and can pretty much work from home but also travel whenever they want. They're pretty well off, financially, but they have a modest house and they're such kind and genuine people. They asked us about our families and shared their stories about when they joined the church, which are always my favorite stories to hear! Brother Brown said that he joined when he was 14 and living in Chicago on the Southside. His parents had passed away and so he went to live with his aunt, but he remembered that the Mormon missionaries used to visit his mom before she passed away. His mom was too sick to be baptized before she passed away, but she wanted it very much. . And he also remembered that his dad would greet the missionaries at the door with a shot gun, but they kept coming back ! I was really taken aback by that and I thought to myself "Would I got back to a house where someone had pointed a gun at me?..." I mean, I'd like to think that the answer would be yes if God was the one telling me to do it, but that takes an insane amount of courage and faith. But I think the reason those missionaries kept visiting them is because they knew one day Brother Brown would accept the gospel, and he did! And so did his sister. And His father eventually stopped pointing a gun at the missionaries when they would come over. But for Brother Brown, joining the church was about becoming part of a family, not so much about making a promise to follow Jesus Christ and our Heavenly Father. And everyone has a different story about how they came to know the church was true, because we are all different. But that's the wonderful thing about the gospel, there's something for everyone! No matter who you are, or where you've been; it's all about knowing where we're going, returning to our Father.

We had so many great things happen this week with less active members and recent converts that we've been working with! There was one day that we were thinking of people to visit and Connie Riddle came to mind. She is a returning less-active member who is getting ready to get married and move in with her soon to be husband. She had been packing up some things in her apartment and had thought about asking someone for help, so she said a quick prayer. And the next thing she knew, we were on her doorstep offering to help! I love it when we are able to be an answer to someone's prayers, it's awesome to be God's hands :)

Thank you all for what you do for your families and friends and the good that you do in your communities! Keep it up! I love you all, have a great week!