The autumn brings doubt
my sickly peonies shrink
will we bloom next spring?
秋は疑いをもたらす私の病気の牡丹は縮む来年の春に咲きますか？
With autumn comes doubtCan I still afford bird seed?Mangoes taste so sweet秋になると疑問が生じるまだ鳥の種を買う余裕はありますか？マンゴーはとても甘い味がしますWith autumn comes doubtGreen tomatoes go mushyI blame the sunlight秋になると疑問が生じる緑のトマトはすべてどろどろになります日光のせい
Shiny red apples
piled up high at the market --
Doctors won't draw near
市場で高く積み上げられた光沢のある赤いリンゴ --医者は彼らに近づきません
A cold dawn kisswhile scattering bird seed --my thoughts fly away夜明けは鳥の餌をまき散らす冷たいキスのようなものです --私の心は飛び去る
The summers grow old,
losing all their teeth and voice --
but I will not weep
夏は古くなり、歯と声を失います --でも泣かないPeeling hard boiled eggs
for guests this hot afternoon
is work for Buddha
この暑い午後はゲストのために固ゆで卵をはがすのは仏陀のための仕事です
The evening cricketsfind a loose patio brickto their great liking夕方のコオロギは、ゆるいパティオのレンガがとても快適だと思っています
"And as all have not faith, seek ye diligently and teach one another words of wisdom; yea, seek ye out of the best books words of wisdom; seek learning, even by study and also by faith."
D&C: 88.
The Lord says faith and study go together hand in hand/We are not to isolate and put our head in sand/The world and all its wonders opens to the faithful saint/with wisdom pouring down from God without the least constraint!
It's not yet autumn --
somewhat mad in the moonlight --
the nights are tepid
まだ秋じゃない --私は月明かりの下で少し狂っています --夜はぬるい
Wrenching the head off --the sticky sunflower sapis hard to wash off
ひまわりの頭をこすり落とすと、洗い流しにくい粘り気のある樹液ができます
An old Provo houseis painted brick and woodwork --wrapped in cottonwoods
プロボの古い家はレンガと木工品で塗装されています --
ポプラの木に窒息した
Today is Sunday, September 5. 2021.
It's a quiet Sabbath afternoon here in my apartment; I've just finished serving roast pork and Lima beans for free to a handful of neighbors who saw the sign on my door reading "Free Meal," and also taken the Sacrament in the Valley Villa Community Room -- our building is one of the few Senior Housing apartment buildings that allows this.
So now the rest of the day looms before me -- an elderly man, divorced and with several chronic health problems that make me a semi-invalid. I don't expect any visitors today -- and I've come to live with that in peace most of the time. I'm devoting more and more time to the writing of Haiku -- I find this gives me a quiet mind and content spirit better than most anything else; except, of course, a visit from my kids and/or grand kids.
I thought I might as well take a crack at writing my own obit. Of course, it won't be complete -- since I don't know yet what I'll die of, or when. I'm counting on my 7 living children to fill in those final, I hope not-too-gruesome, details.
Let's switch to third-person:
Timothy Robert Torkildson was born on September 11th, 1953, at Saint Mary's Hospital, in Minneapolis, Minnesota.
He had an older half-brother, Leonard, who passed away about ten years ago. He also has an older brother William, who is ten years older than he is, and lives in Princeton, Minnesota.
He has two younger sisters: Sue Ellen Yund, and Linda Torkildson.
His father, Donald Torkildson, passed away in 1983, and his mother, Evelyn Torkildson (nee Gagne) passed away in 1998. His father worked as a bartender at Aarone's Bar & Grill his entire life. His mother was a homemaker, who was very active with the PTA and as a precinct voting judge.
He is survived (we hope!) by his former wife, Amy Anderson, and their seven children: Madelaine, Adam, Stephen, Sarah, Virginia, Edward, and Daisy. Their son Irvin passed away while still only 8 years old.
At the age of 17 Tim left home to attend the Ringling Clown College in Venice Florida. While there he met Tim Holst, who would change his life forever.
Although Tim was not naturally adept at acrobatics, juggling, unicycling, or even putting on a decent clown makeup, he was still offered a contract for $125.00 a week as a new clown, a First of May, with the Greatest Show on Earth, and began rehearsals with the Blue Unit in 1973. He told others that the only reason he was hired was because at the time he was so very thin he could fit into any show costume without it having to be altered -- which represented a substantial savings to the circus management; they needed dancing fodder for their renowned costumed musical pieces in the show, such as Opening, Manage, Spec, and the Spanish Web.
At rehearsals in Winter Quarters in Venice Tim became interested in the activities and beliefs of Tim Holst, a returned LDS missionary from Illinois. Holst invited Tim to take the Discussions from the local missionaries -- and on New Year's Day 1973 Tim was baptized a member of The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints at the local chapel in Sarasota. Despite the many vicissitudes and follies of his life, he cherished his membership in the Church and bore testimony of its truth and light to his children, grand children, and many others over the years.
He was called to serve a two year mission to the Kingdom of Thailand in 1976; his Mission President, Howard Morris, requested him to bring his clown paraphernalia along to do charity shows for the Thai Red Cross. During his two years of service in Thailand he performed several hundred times at schools, hospitals, libraries, Buddhist temple festivals, and even prisons, at no charge.
When he returned home he went back with Ringling Brothers as a clown, but left the show in disgrace after getting into a fight with Michu, the World's Smallest Man. Blacklisted from circuses, Tim attended Brown Institute of Broadcasting and after nine months went to work at KGCX Radio in Williston North Dakota -- where he immediately fell in love with Amy Anderson, a Special Ed teacher in Tioga.
They were married in the Salt Lake Temple and the first few years of their marriage was a hectic and helter skelter existence as Tim kept looking for radio work that would support his growing family. Finally, through the good offices of Tim Holst, who by now was Vice President of Talent at Ringling, the blacklist was lifted and Tim was able to go back to work for circuses, including several Shrine circuses, work at Disneyland, as Ronald McDonald in Kansas, and with mud shows like Carson & Barnes and Culpepper & Merriweather.
Tim and Amy divorced in 1994.
Tim moved back to Thailand as an English teacher for several years, but eventually decided to return to the States to reestablish relationships with his children.
He retired and settled in Provo Utah, where he devoted most of his time to cooking meals for others and writing middling poetry.
When asked for an epitaph for himself, he told his friends: "He will be missed -- but not by much."
Snail on the sidewalk --
doubtful it can cross alone --
my hands must stay clean
歩道にカタツムリがあります --それがそれ自体で交差できるかどうかは疑わしい --私の手は清潔に保たなければなりません
Walking home from workthe man wears a greasy cap --his mustache slouches
仕事から家に帰ると、男は脂っこい帽子をかぶっている --彼の口ひげは垂れ下がる
Voice of the ring dove --Low. Insistent. Pleading what?More millet in peace.
リング鳩の声 --低い。しつこい。何を訴える？安心してキビを増やす
Man in greasy cap wearing thinning overalls --sits and chews and spits
男は脂っこい帽子と裸のオーバーオールを着ています --彼は座って噛んで唾を吐きます
Bird in a dead treesings to the Resurrection --very few listen
枯れ木の鳥が復活について歌う --聞く人はほとんどいません
Where will the leaves blow?
Planning for messy autumn
is a brown comfort
葉はどこに吹くのでしょうか？散らかった秋の計画は退屈な快適さです
Crows shoot into treeslike pellets in a targetthe night chases them
カラスはターゲットのペレットのように木に撃ちます夜は彼らを追いかけます
Around the small housethe unexpected waters flow --the wind is crying
小さな家の周りに思いがけない水が流れる --風が泣いている