Comic-cons and cosplays are a fad that makes me frown.
Because, you see, for quite some time I've been a circus clown.
Funny caps and crazy gear I trotted out for chortles;
I never thought myself to be those comic book immortals.
Now when I get dressed in large red shoes and baggy trousers,
people want to know where they can play me on their browsers!
There's nothing that a banker
likes better than to raise
their int'rest rate to levels
that worry and amaze.
The only math they practice
is multiply and add;
leaving all us gudgeons
to wander barrel-clad.
My wife and I grow older
and our manifest concern
is independent living
as our frailties we spurn.
We enter second childhood
and ride off on Harley hog --
fleeing further fading
by backpacking all through Prague.
Mr. Putin likes to bully
with his threats both wild and woolly.
Eaten up with grim insanity,
he defends his urgent vanity
by suggesting atom bomb
will resolve his Vietnam.
my networking is rather rough;
I never know what kind of stuff
to post for influential chums
that won't mark me as from the slums.
are fart jokes any good at all?
or how to rob a shopping mall?
I might suggest my kidney stone
requires a small privy loan . . .
I'd rather shop at Tiffany's
than any groc'ry store.
The prices are more moderate
and do not make me sore.
Eggs and meat and cheeses
are extravagantly marked;
the more I look upon them
the more chance I will infarct!
The Great Salt Lake is shrinking;
a puddle it will be.
A parking lot we'll make it
(that ain't hyperbole!)
The West is getting hotter
than you-know-where, muchachos --
twill only be a fit place
