Haiku: Words are butterflies

Words are butterflies
Not hornets at the picnic
Form them tenderly

There once was a nurse from Grand Junction

From the Wall Street Journal:

OAKLAND, Calif.—The 185,000-strong National Nurses United is the scrubs-wearing symbol of a split in the Democratic Party that threatens to inflict damage at the presidential nominating convention in Philadelphia.

While Hillary Clinton tries to bring the nomination battle to a close and unite the party before the general election showdown with presumptive Republican nominee Donald Trump, the nurses are having none of it. They are looking for a fight.

There once was a nurse from Grand Junction

who thought it her paramount function

to needle Ms Clinton

and keep her from sprintin'

to the White House with such unction. 

The TV Reporter

The TV reporter pretends
to follow legitimate trends.
But if they film sex
and lots of car wrecks
they soon own a Mercedes Benz. 

If you're old and homeless

If you're old and homeless there is something you can do
to improve your station and obtain a better view.
Just think a happy thought throughout the day, my hobo friend,
and you will find your homelessness will come right to an end.
For thoughts control our actions, and our actions make things right,
and soon you will not sleep inside a cardboard box each night!
Don't ask for help from others, for they're far too busy now
buying condos and good meals and doing things highbrow.
Pull upon your bootstraps and repent of all your sloth
and you will soon have caviar instead of chicken broth.
Once you face the fact that being homeless is a crime,
you can leave those other bums behind in quick-step time!

The Poor

(Mathew 26:11)

When Jesus proclaimed that the poor

Would be with us forevermore,

Does that justify

The hungry child’s cry

Or having a cardboard décor? 

A journalist's life is so hard

A journalist's life is so hard;
they constantly must be on guard
for lies and deceit,
or better news beat --
no wonder they drink like a bard.

The price of a blowout wedding in 1947? A staggering $2,500

A wedding is not inexpensive;
making the man rather pensive.
He pays to be wed,
then just might be bled
for a divorce that's extensive. 

Baylor Demotes President Kenneth Starr Over Handling of Sex Assault Cases

In college the students aren't stones;
Besides paying off student loans,
they dream about sex
and all its effects.
Even a saint has hormones!    

None of us want tomorrow

"The fact of the matter is none of us want tomorrow . . . "  Jeffrey R. Holland.  

Tomorrow is a looming dread so often, that tis said
the only happy man on earth is one who stays in bed.
But life demands our labor and our sweat, and sometimes pain;
all to pay the mortgages we've struggled so to gain.
And at the end of day we may well say "O what's the use?"
"No matter what I'm doing I am met with but abuse!"
But we don't own tomorrow, and it comes as no surprise
that the Owner of tomorrow is quite loving, kind, and wise.
So leave tomorrow in the hands of One who only strives
to help us find the meaning and the joy of our brief lives.  

Don Rickles

Comics mature awful slowly;
but this one was like the E. coli.
One night was enough
for him to rebuff
your self esteem like a coarse goalie.