You just might be a Christian
if you burst into song
when things are far from perfect
and so much seems so wrong.
For faith in the Atonement
and charity performed
causes folk to warble
as their heart is warmed.
You just might be a Christian
if you burst into song
when things are far from perfect
and so much seems so wrong.
For faith in the Atonement
and charity performed
causes folk to warble
as their heart is warmed.
As America becomes more partisan
and divided,
I have found a way to become
filthy rich.
It's a simple case of adopt
and then adapt.
Since everyone is sticking up
for their rights and no longer
fears being disagreeable,
our nation's infrastructure has
come unraveled.
My company's solution:
the extendible flag pole.
When a governor wants to honor
some dead liberal or conservative
by lowering the flag to half mast,
there's always a riot and legislative
deadlock.
My poles solve the problem
by leaving the flag in place,
and sending the pole up another ten
feet or more.
In other words,
you don't move the flag --
you move the pole.
I've got orders from every state in the Union --
and Puerto Rico and the District of Columbia.
And I'm going to use my wealth
to buy Lake Erie and drain it
for a parking lot.
The largest truth of our existence
is there isn't any distance
'tween ourselves and God above;
we all shall see him with great love
on that day when He shall reach
out to us to heal the breach.
Mother's in the cellar
Bear one another's burdens,
as the scriptures tell us to --
and while you're at it criticize
the things that others do.
Each kindness to another
ought to have a little sting --
so they are not forgetting
that their life's a boxing ring.
Half a million people dead
as the Covid illness spread.
Did they have to die that way
here in our own USA?
Many might have been so spared
had our country been prepared.
Leaders bickered while we died,
so charge them now with homicide!
Monkeys are in short supply
for testing of vaccines.
So I say use Republicans;
they're close enough, it seems.
They like to howl and caper
and throw nastiness about;
and when they do not get their way
they scratch themselves & pout.
Cops and press don't always mix;
one has pens, the other sticks.
When the two cross paths too oft,
reporters learn their heads are soft.
Tax returns
from Donald Trump
will soon be seen
from clump to clump.
If this annoys
the right wing crowd
let them go chew
a nimbus cloud.
Doctors
are not
my best friend.
Avoiding them
is a godsend.
Ignorance
is bliss to me,
when medicos
I do not see.
Riding in a Boeing Jet
leads to something like regret.
Since it falls apart midair,
make sure you've
paid your Medicare.
In King Lear Cordelia spoke
of best and worst intentions.
The good we do, or wish to do,
are often just inventions.
How many die from violence
or from a broken heart,
to give another liberty
to make another start?
Need a good laugh? See my latest podcast here: https://bit.ly/3dyYa6P
Work and pray consistently
if you want God's guarantee,
not for wealth and fame per se,
but for hope each living day;
those who won't lie down when beat
find the Lord makes hardship sweet!
There was an old man in Texas/supplied by the electrical nexus/who during a storm/was not billed the norm/but got a blow to the solar plexus.
In North Korea live a folk/most of whom soon will croak/if sanctions are not lifted/yet their blame is never shifted/to their leader who's a joke.
Lindsey Graham made a vow/No More Trump No Matter How!/Now he's golfing with the jerk/doing all his paperwork/Like the flame attracts the moth/Graham seeks that Ostrogoth.
infrastructures cross the land/shaking like a palsied hand/no one knows just when they'll fail/from tornado, snow, or hail/raising taxes for a fix/will be Biden's greatest tricks.
Lift up your head and bow down no more.
The Lord in his mercy has settled the score.
What once was a wasteland, scattered and gone
by foolish actions now thrives with the dawn.
Fountains of honey and milk do await
those who believe God alone is all great.