Kishkumen

  Now when those people who were desirous that he should be their governor saw that he was condemned unto death, therefore they were angry, and behold, they sent forth one Kishkumen, even to the judgment-seat of Pahoran, and murdered Pahoran as he sat upon the judgment-seat.

Helamen 1:9

There's always one more Kishkumen available to slay

the leaders of the people as they make their busy way.

The turbulence of office and the envy of great power

plants the seeds of murder that becomes a deadly flower.

Assassins worm their way into the fabric of each nation,

who never lack a patron for their horrid aberration. 

God save us all from bloodshed and the undiscovered knife

in this year of rumor and electioneering strife! 

The Freeloader

Part of their strategy is to let shoppers try out thousands of shading, sparkling, contouring and highlighting products—including Urban Decay eye shadow, Chanel perfumes and Smashbox lipsticks. There are no pushy salespeople. Just bright lights, open containers and plenty of mirrors.

Their self-service stations invite people to test the limits of what’s free—and many do, treating the places as extensions of their own bathrooms.

Biology professor Elizabeth Brooks and her team of researchers at Rowan University examined beauty testers at retailers a decade ago, ranging from high-end department stores to drugstores. The results from the oft-cited study showed that testers from more than 50% of products were contaminated with bacteria.

(from the Wall Street Journal)

When mooching cosmetics, be wary
of catching some nice dysentery.
Bacteria teem
in all the cold cream,
and on the lip gloss microbes tarry.

Sticky Rice

I made myself some sticky rice tonight.

It was a mistake.

The smell and the texture and the taste, it all reminded me of Joom.

And I began to miss her, badly.

I remember her dipping her brown hand into the bamboo basket to roll up a ball for me. Then she hands it to me with a mischievous smile, as if it were booby-trapped. She still can't believe a farang likes the stuff.

There's always a bowl of fermented fish paste on the table, along with raw cucumbers, those long green beans, and Thai eggplant.

That's a complete meal for Joom. She laughs at me when I complain about not having any meat or curry. She eats Isaan; and she means for me to eat that way too.

We bicker good-naturedly, while her dog Nipoo curls herself around Joom's legs, panting and snapping at the mosquitoes.

We always end the night with a walk on the beach, with embraces, with awkward words from me and indistinct murmurs from her.

Then I have to leave the country. I know she needs money but I haven't any to give to her. It embarrasses me, and makes me unreasonably mad at her, so we part as distant friends, not as lovers.

And I go away, and tell myself I'll forget her after a while, and she'll forget me.

And so it happens. Very slowly for me.

Until tonight, when that cursed sticky rice stirs up memories and passions I don't want to live with anymore.

But like a stomach ache or Charley horse, it will soon pass.

All things must pass . . .

That's in the scriptures somewhere, isn't it?

Falling food prices

The U.S. is on track this year to post the longest stretch of falling food prices in more than 50 years, a streak that is cheering U.S. shoppers at the checkout line but putting a financial strain on farmers, grocery stores and restaurants.

(from the Wall Street Journal)

Food is so cheap nowadays

that I can eat hearty always.

The cafes may scream

and farmers vent steam;

at home I eat steak lyonnaise. 

Air Ambulances

While ground ambulances can be regulated, Guy Dansie, emergency medical services program manager for the Utah Department of Health, points out that air ambulances fly right over state jurisdictions — and therefore are subject to little if any oversight, even if the company that operates them is based in Utah. The companies also don't have to share cost information with the public or state regulators, he says.

(from the Salt Lake Tribune)

If down a steep canyon I dive,

don't worry if I will survive.

I'd rather not live

with debt like a shiv 

that's stuck in my back, tho I thrive. 

The Earlobe

An earlobe no purpose does serve;
to life it contributes no verve.
It might be cheering
for hanging an earring;
to me it's a facial hors d'oeuvre. 

I've lost the knack of wonder

A prophet of God once offered me counsel that gives me peace. I was worried that the choices of others might make it impossible for our family to be together forever. He said, “You are worrying about the wrong problem. You just live worthy of the celestial kingdom, and the family arrangements will be more wonderful than you can imagine.”

Henry B. Eyring 

I've lost the knack of wonder in this busy busy world,

and found my hope in better things around the edges curled.

I've got so bound up in the faults of others that I miss

the promise in a sunrise and the evening's gentle kiss.

Left up my head, oh Lord my God; direct my eyes aright,

so I may see horizons that still blaze with beauty bright! 

Observations on Stake Conference

• The longer the meeting the longer my appetite.
• In the Celestial Kingdom, nobody will have to deal with folding chairs.
• The front pews are always reserved for latecomers for their complete embarrassment. 
• The louder the Stake Choir, the louder the Stake.
• No Stake President has ever worn a bow tie.
• Babies are encouraged by their parents to swallow an air horn prior to coming to Conference.
• A third of the congregation has brought their own water bottles; the other two-thirds chew gum.
• During a moment of silence, when the Spirit is trying to break through, a cell phone will ring insistently. 
• The Spanish interpreter is causing feedback from his microphone.
• An announcement will be made that there is a white Toyota in the parking lot with its lights on.
• Nobody ever dreams of having a gigantic potluck after Stake Conference -- except maybe me.

Arrow in Flight

"We launch our children like arrows; let us make sure our aim is straight and true!"  Jeffrey R. Holland.

My children launched like arrows
so many years ago;
today they have their children
to fit upon their bow.

What courses went those arrows?
Did I aim carefully?
Forgive me, Father, if my arm
drew back too faithlessly!

I pray that it is not too late
to guide them on their way
to your choice mansions up above
upon the Judgement Day!

When choosing a place close to God

Fully 83% of Americans who have looked for a new place of worship say the quality of preaching played an important role in their choice of congregation. Nearly as many say it was important to feel welcomed by clergy and lay leaders, and about three-quarters say the style of worship services influenced their decision about which congregation to join. Location also factored prominently in many people’s choice of congregation, with seven-in-ten saying it was an important factor. Smaller numbers cite the quality of children’s programs, having friends or family in the congregation or the availability of volunteering opportunities as key to their decision.
(from the Pew Research Center)

When choosing a place close to God
I think it exceedingly odd
that most want the ease
of sermons that please,
and not the legit iron rod.