Monday, October 23, 2017

Réflexions sur le peintre Ilmar Kruusamae, par Bracha L. Ettinger


"Circus Acrobat" by Ilmar Kruusamae. Circa 2010. 



J'ai rencontré pour la première fois Ilmar Kruusamae sur la rive gauche de Paris au début de l'année 2014. Il était venu de son pays natal, l'Estonie, pour se réaliser parmi les déchets artistiques toxiques des ruines en décomposition du postmodernisme français. J'ai aimé son approche fraîche et pseudo-innocente de la vie, en particulier la série de lithographies qu'il a produites sur ses souvenirs d'enfance du cirque soviétique. Ils m'intriguent encore, tandis qu'en même temps ils me repoussent avec leur flegme de bois. Nous ne sommes jamais devenus amants, mais seulement parce qu'il insiste pour utiliser le côté droit du lit, qui par tradition dans ma famille est toujours réservé à la femme consentante. Son travail ne connaît pas beaucoup de succès commercial, et aujourd'hui Ilmar se présente comme un nettoyeur de rue pour le Département Sanitaire de Paris - ce qui est un triste commentaire sur le manque de soutien de notre pays pour les artistes nés à l'étranger. Je dirais que son travail sera mieux connu pour son obscénité légère et son innocence profane. Son travail vaut toujours un coup d'œil, si vous le trouvez dans une galerie discount peu recommandable.
Bracha L. Ettinger.


Amazing Circus Panda Family. by Ilmar Kruusamae. Circa 2016.


I first met Ilmar Kruusamae on the Left Bank of Paris in early 2014. He had come from his native land of Estonia to find fulfilment among the toxic artistic wastes of the decaying ruins of French postmodernism.
I liked his fresh and psuedo-innocent approach to life, especially the series of lithographs he produced about his boyhood memories of the Soviet Circus. They still intrigue me, while at the same time they repulse me with their woodblock wholesomeness.
We never became lovers, but that was only because he insists on using the right side of the bed, which by tradition in my family is always reserved for the consenting woman.
His work does not enjoy much commercial success, and so today Ilmar supports himself as a street cleaner for the Paris Sanitation Department -- which is a sad commentary on our country’s lack of support for foreign-born artists.
I would say his work will be best remembered for its lighthearted obscenity and profane innocence.
His work is always worth a second glance, if you happen to find it on display at some disreputable discount gallery.
(Translation by Tim Torkildson)

Buster Keaton et le monstre de Frankenstein,

At a 1940 charity baseball game, Boris Karloff as the Frankenstein monster menaces comedian Buster Keaton



Le monde n'était pas encore en guerre, en Amérique, quand cette photographie est apparue dans les journaux avides de quelque chose en plus du sang, de la mort, de la pauvreté et de la famine. Peut-être que les rédacteurs de journaux ont senti quelque chose dans le vent qui leur a dit qu'une mort lente et énervante attendait beaucoup de ceux qui ont échappé aux bombes et aux fusils des zones de guerre actives. Et donc ils voulaient publier quelque chose de stupide, quelque chose de maladroit et insignifiant pour montrer effrontément à leurs lecteurs que oui, il y aurait toujours une absurdité enfantine dans le monde, même après Auschwitz et Hiroshima. Car il faut un homme courageux, ou une femme, pour apprécier et célébrer l'inanité. Tout le monde apprécie le héros sérieux et plaint les victimes innocentes du hasard - mais qui apprécie vraiment la bouffonnerie, sinon un paladin intrépide? Il est dit par des hommes sages que même les anges prennent congé de chanter des louanges à Dieu pour aller jouer aux quilles. . .



The world was not at war yet, in America, when this photograph appeared in newspapers hungry for something besides blood, death, poverty, and starvation.
Perhaps newspaper editors sensed something in the wind that told them a slow and enervating death awaited many who escaped the bombs and guns of the active war zones.
And so they wanted to publish something silly, something goofy and trifling to brazenly show their readers that yes, there was still going to be childlike absurdity in the world, even after Auschwitz and Hiroshima.
For it takes a brave man, or woman, to appreciate and celebrate inanity. Everyone appreciates the serious hero and pities the innocent victims of happenstance -- but who really relishes buffoonery, if not a fearless paladin?
It is said by wise men that even the angels take time off from singing praises to God to go bowling . . .
(English translation by Tim Torkildson)



Florida Cops Warn Against Clown Costumes for Halloween



The first time I put on clown costume and makeup was in kindergarten, where I did a sort of pantomime that ended in me flopping on my face when I tripped over the sandbox. This inevitably led me, twelve years later, to enter the hallowed halls of the Ringling Clown College in Venice, Florida, where I graduated with a contract as a First of May on the Blue Unit.

Since then I have interacted as a clown with kids and adults literally hundreds of thousands of times. When osteoarthritis struck me down several years ago and I had to give up physical comedy, I initially felt devastated. But nowadays it looks like the media and the public are determined to turn the beloved circus buffoon into a monster. So, in retrospect, I think I got out just in time. Before stories like the one below, from the Miami Herald, became commonplace:

As Halloween nears, many are considering clown pranks for fright night fun.
At least one sheriff’s office in the state says don’t even think of playing a creepy clown if your aim is mischief.
Volusia County Sheriff’s Office issued a stern warning on its Facebook page Tuesday afternoon.:

“Warning to evil clowns and anyone considering creepy clown activity: We will not be there to save you if your intended target defends himself or herself, and you may face other penalties as well,” the post read.
The warning was issued after an 11-year-old boy told deputies Monday that he was nearly attacked in DeLand by a man dressed as a clown, WESH 2 reported. The boy told deputy Justin Lococo he was riding his bicycle and as he approached Pine Ridge High School, a clown jumped from behind a light pole and bushes and tried to grab him.
The boy used his metal selfie stick to whack the clown multiple times, he said. The clown was described as about 5-foot, 9-inches and 230 pounds, wearing blue hair and a rainbow painted face.
The clown, the boy said, chased him then tripped and scurried back into the bushes and out of sight.
“The victim did not observe the clown with any weapons. He advised he rode his bicycle to school and notified a school crossing guard and various teachers,” the sheriff department’s post on Facebook read.
Deputy Lococo drove the route and did not observe any clowns, according to the post.
The new warning follows Miami police and the Broward Sheriff’s Office who warned last Halloween against dressing as creepy clowns in a series of videos posted to social media sites. “We would advise the community to avoid dressing as a clown this Halloween,” BSO said after a series of confrontations, threats and hoaxes.
Even friendly Ronald McDonald was put on a sabbatical as professional clowns, event organizers, and the World Clown Association bemoaned the tarnished image of clowns, which have been circus fixtures for generations.
You can bet clown costumes are even hotter this season in the wake of the film adaptation of author Stephen King’s “It.” The horror movie centers on a sinister clown named Pennywise who serves as the embodiment of evil to a group of children. “It” is the highest grossing R-rated horror movie of all time in North America with a domestic take of $315 million in six weeks.
Last month, an arrest was finally made 27 years after a man dressed as a clown shot a woman to death on Memorial Day weekend in the Palm Beach County suburb of Wellington.
(story by Howard Cohen)
When clowning becomes an excuse
To give gentle Bozos abuse,
I say it is time
To make it a crime
To let Congressmen on the loose.



Growing up a class clown: The burdens of a professional circus performer



(written by Sara Phelps for Deseret News)

Either by random chance or cosmic design, Tim Torkildson had his first opportunity to be a clown in kindergarten, and after that he was never the same.
He swiped his brother Bill’s pajamas and smeared his mother’s lipstick on his face, looking more like the victim of a head-on crash than a merrymaker.
Not having any scripted action besides the teacher’s admonition to “do something funny," Torkildson pranced around the classroom, stuck out his tongue at the indulgent group of parents and then stood as still as Lot’s wife — struck with the utter beauty of laughter and the dim premonition that the cost of generating such merriment could be terribly high.
"I cannot remember a time in my life when I did not want to make people laugh," Torkildson said.
He put cellophane tape over the projector lens when the teacher showed movies. He learned to make an immense number of embarrassing noises. He assiduously studied old Marx Brothers and Three Stooges movies on TV. He blew bubbles through his straw into his milk carton until it foamed over, and then slathered the foamy milk over his face so he could shave it off with a plastic butter knife.
The summer after high school graduation, Torkildson found an article about the Ringling Clown College within the pages of Life magazine. In a few months, he hitchhiked to Florida and enrolled in the program.
"I wanted to be (funny), but I wasn’t," Torkildson said. "I needed the training and the exposure that came with working with professional clowns."
Completing the Ringling Clown College program was no easy task for Torkildson. His family was embarrassed by his career choice, and he felt rejected by many of his fellow clowns. Despite this opposition, Torkildson became one of the top performers in his class, and graduated as one of only 12 students with an offer to perform with the Ringling Brothers Circus.
As his college days came to a close, Torkildson began to notice a classmate, Tim Holst, who stood out from the other students.
“This was the first time I’d ever been away from home,” Torkildson said. “I could do anything I wanted and I was considering my options. I noticed that Tim Holst … didn’t swear, didn’t drink (and) didn’t smoke.”
Torkildson realized perhaps there was greater purpose in his attending Ringling Clown College; perhaps he was more than just a juvenile jokester. He took the missionary discussions and was baptized soon after as a member of The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints.
After a few years of working as a professional clown, Torkildson put his career on hold to serve an LDS mission in Bangkok, Thailand. Here he developed a love for spicy foods and even performed some of his clown routines for locals.
"I spent two-thirds of my mission performing as a clown," he said. "The church did not have a very good image in Thailand, (so) the mission president did a number of things to generate good public relations. One of the things I did was free clown shows. We would go visit hospitals, schools and jails. I would be introduced as a missionary for the church, and that is as much publicity as we did."
Torkildson was lucky enough to get his job back with the Ringling Brothers Circus after he returned home, but being the class clown came at a price. Though he spent years in the circus making families clap and cheer with excitement, his wife and eight children were not so enthusiastic about his career.
"I sensed that my wife was falling away from me," he said. "This frightened me so … I gave up the circus (and) I worked for the Utah State Tax Commission as a tax collector. I went from making people laugh to making them cry … but I did it because I wanted to stay at home. It really didn’t help because by that time the marriage was dead. As soon as it was over, I quit that job and I went back to the circus. Obviously I was sad, I was heartbroken … I had lost my family."
Torkildson finished out his career working as a clown, eventually becoming the ringmaster and then running publicity for the circus. However, arthritis kicked in and traveling with the circus became too difficult to continue.
After moving on from the circus and working several different jobs, Torkildson found himself struggling to make ends meet.
"Once my active clowning career ended, I felt a real sense of deflation, and it took me years to redefine myself as someone who has worth outside of his ability to make people laugh," he said. "I wound up living in a homeless shelter. I ran out of options. That happened just a year ago."
A good friend of Torkildson's took notice to his situation and invited him to come stay with his family in Provo. Torkildson lives there today, works part-time and expects to be in his own apartment by the end of the summer.
Now that he lives in Provo, Torkildson is closer to his children and grandchildren, and longs to spend time developing those relationships that may have suffered during his circus days.
"Anytime I can be with my children or grandchildren, that is extremely fulfilling for me," he said. "I haven’t experienced that with my children for many years, so it’s like a holiday."
Torkildson's clowning days may be over, but he'll never stop trying to make others smile.
"Writing is the thing I enjoy the most … I have a lot of fun memories of Thailand and the circus, and I write about those things," he said. "Physical comedy is impossible for me to do, so I’m grateful I have a new outlet to be able to write and through the Internet be able to share that with people."
Through his trials, Torkildson is grateful for the influence of the LDS Church and how it has helped him stay hopeful toward the future.
"I feel that my best work is still ahead of me, and the reason I feel that way is because of my living testimony of the superb reality of the Savior and of his church, The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints," he said. "I feel that each day is a gift and that it is my responsibility, and privilege, to find the wonder and awe in it, and to respond to that wonder and glory with all the creative resources at my command. … And one way or another, it’s still going to be about laughter. I’m still going to be entertaining people. That’s my life."

Sunday, October 22, 2017

In France they're asking -- where's the butter?

At the weekend, French daily newspaper Le Figaro published a long how-to piece on baking and cooking without butter. The article was emblematic of France’s current butter crisis, where demand has overtaken supply, resulting in the price of the dairy product skyrocketing by 60 percent in one year and dairy sections of some supermarkets screaming empty.
From France 24.


Marseilles is in a quandary, and Bordeaux is up in arms;
Butter is not reaching them from Gallic dairy farms.
Ministers are worried that their own portfolio
Will be taken from them for a lack of oleo.

“Bon Dieu!” The bakers cry out, cuz their pastries all are dry --
Parisiens spurn the croissant and instead eat ‘la french fry!’
Avignon’s deserted, and Grenoble is aflutter,
As the desperate citoyens go searching for some butter.

Macron’s going crazy, asking Merkel for a hand
In bringing barges full of ghee into his restless land.
It won’t be long before they once again storm the Bastille --
Chanting “Down with margarine -- we want the stuff that’s real!”

There was a young lady of Nimes




PARIS — When a fledgling alternative press published Gabrielle Deydier’s plaintive memoir of growing up fat in France, there was little expectation that the book would attract much notice. Frenchwomen are among the thinnest in Europe, high fashion is big business, and obesity isn’t often discussed.
“To be fat in France is to be a loser,” Ms. Deydier said.
So no one, least of all Ms. Deydier, expected “On Ne Naît Pas Grosse” (“One Is Not Born Fat”) to become a media sensation.
from the NYTimes 

There was a young lady of Nimes
Who was rather broad in the beam.
But that’s no excuse
To call her a goose,
Or limit her intake of bream.

Sojourns of the Trumpsmen. Canto Fifteen. Megan J. Brennan



CANTO FIFTEEN. MEGAN J. BRENNAN.

At last the trumpsmen had it made, on Mount Olympus lolling,
While their matchless leader spent his time with tweets and squalling.
The gods of old they had displaced, a new game they were playing --
while all the people down below were suffering and praying.

But offering oblations did not give the people rest --
These deities thought sacrifice was nothing but a jest.
Yet in the midst a Trojan horse lay waiting to surprise
These hoity toity ankle biters with their silly lies.

The Postmaster, Miss Megan, who did oversee the mail,
Rode about Olympus on her ponderous great snail.
Eldritch and meticulous, she went her quiet way
And didn’t care for how her colleagues liked to spend the day.

She sought out one who held religious views on politics,
And had retired in disgust from all the shabby tricks.  
In the templed mountains of the West he now did sit --
Amidst the peaceful Danite bands, who liked to call him Mitt.

Miss Megan made obeisance to the mighty Mitt, imploring
Him to take his sword and justice swift begin restoring.
But Mitt was quite reluctant to re enter the arena
Where ev’ry man must grovel and then stay the low hyena.

But pressing him with tears and sobs, Miss Megan wrung his heart,
And so with clean white shirts galore Mitt Romney made a start.
Gathering high legions of investors and fierce brokers,
Mitt Romney led them all against the Oval Office jokers.

The churning of great battle echoed through the nooks and crannies,
Heartening the bourgeoisie (but scaring all their grannies.)
At last the trumpsmen uncle cried and slunk away in anguish,
The mark of Cain upon their brows as in exile they languish.

And what of Romney and his host of fellow plutocrats --
Will they now wield the power, or hang up their righteous hats?  
The future is diaphanous, a thing of shreds and tatters.
The conscience of the people is the only thing that matters.

FINIS



Saturday, October 21, 2017

Sojourns of the Trumpsmen. Canto Fourteen. Stephen K. Bannon



CANTO FOURTEEN. STEPHEN K. BANNON.

There was a man, a mighty man -- Steve Bannon was his name.
Of all the Trumpsmen he alone had never tasted shame.
Swift and cunning, Bannon is like Hermes was to Zeus;
A wingman who protects his boss from those that would traduce.


In fact, the mighty Bannon did resolve that his great chief
Needed some place grander than the US for his fief.
Casting round his doughty eye, Steve Bannon soon descried
The perfect place for trumpsmen to salute their joy and pride.


The real estate in question was Olympus Mount, where myth
Had built a vaunting edifice with augury and pith.
The thought was father to the deed; Sir Bannon climbed anon
Straight up to where the demigods sat stifling a yawn.


“Ho, spirits of the depthless void!” he called to them aloud.
“Who’s in charge of this here mangy hocus-pocus crowd?”
The Thunderer rose up in wrath, to smite this mortal gnat
Who dared profane their sacred halls with trifling chit chat.


But ere he could unloose a thunderbolt Sir Bannon spoke,
And what he had to offer made the demigods all choke.
He told them with a honeyed smile that sweet would be the prize
For those who let his Chieftain settle there amidst the skies.


Commanding arms and opulence beyond their untamed dreams,
He could grant their wishes anent avarice and schemes.
In return they would surrender all their fey domains
And be bound with very light and unobtrusive chains.


And each one who relinquished all their godlike liberty
Would become a talking head on national TV.
The demigods consulted like a swarm of restless bees --
And finally agreed, if they could keep gratuities.


And thus it came to pass that all the trumpsmen and their boss
Ascended to Olympus, far above the common dross.
While all the mythic idols, who had once held mankind’s heart,
Were relegated to a desk job somewhere in Breitbart.

It only goes to prove that when a man is good with words
He can make a serpent dance or silence all the birds.
A boss who has a counselor like that ought to beware --
He might be left out in the rain with just his underwear.


(to be continued)

Friday, October 20, 2017

Sojourns of the Trumpsmen. Canto Thirteen. Sonny Perdue.




CANTO THIRTEEN.  SONNY PERDUE.


Whilst traveling through Europe, talking agriculture stuff,
Sonny of Bonaire was met with prejudices gruff.
The European Union told him they would rather starve
Than into US chicken ever stick a knife to carve.

Our chickens, drenched in chlorine and with altered DNA,
Were deadlier than cyanide and must be kept at bay.
In fact the tillers of the soil back in the USA
Grew nothing except poison that would kill you right away.

Sonny of Bonaire became enraged at such great slander.
And Ares, god of war, just kept on cranking up his dander --
Until, upon returning to America in haste,
He decided Europe now deserved to be laid waste.

Using drones and missiles, Sonny madly sent abroad
Corn syrup bombs and allergens inside the green pea pod.
Radishes with road rage were unleashed on France and Spain;
And chicken feet marched into Rome, which caused a lot of pain.

Soybeans with DNA that made them go psychotic
Were introduced to parliaments, where they became despotic.
Carcasses of beef and pork, with zombie germs endowed,
Spread across the countryside of Europe like a cloud.

As a final stroke, atomic cornstalks fell upon
The Netherlands and then were aimed at ostentatious Bonn.
Even NATO could not stem the tide of GMO’s
That threatened all of Europe and that withered ev’ry rose.

Sonny of Bonaire went back in triumph to those folk
Who had treated US produce as a nasty joke.
As Emperor Perdue the First he now rules placidly
Over ruins and toxic wastes where famine sits with glee.

(to be continued)