Saturday, January 26, 2019
Friday, January 25, 2019
And one was wealthy; one was poor
WASHINGTON—Democratic presidential candidate Elizabeth Warren is proposing an annual wealth tax, attempting to combat inequality and raise trillions of dollars with a significant new levy on the very richest Americans.
Ms. Warren’s proposal would impose a 2% annual tax on household wealth above $50 million and an additional 1% tax on wealth above $1 billion. The tax would affect about 75,000 households and raise $2.75 trillion over a decade, according to economists Emmanuel Saez and Gabriel Zucman, who analyzed the plan for the Massachusetts senator.
WSJ @RichardRubinDC
The stork dropped in to town one day;
two infants in two cribs did lay.
And one was wealthy; one was poor.
So one had less and one had more.
Do not hasten to conclusion;
down the road there'll be confusion!
Poverty and wealth aren't easy
to define if you are breezy.
The wealthy babe grew up with cash;
enough so he could make a splash
by giving much to charity
and living pretty worry free.
In fact, the older that he grew
the less was money like a glue
that stuck to him through thick and thin.
(His bankers thought his gifts a sin.)
So when he reached a ripe old age
his wealth had not become a cage;
unlike that Bible rich guy, Dives,
our friend was happy (no ex-wives.)
Yet it did please the IRS
to cause this man complete distress;
they wanted all his wealth to tax,
but found he gave away such stacks
that there was little left to grab,
and so they sent the cops to nab
him for an unjust allegation --
he was charged with tax evasion!
And now he languishes in jail;
his spirits droop, his skin is pale.
He's stamping license plates all day,
and wonders how he went astray.
The other babe, in poverty,
grew up a welfare prodigy;
while on the dole he learned to shirk
and to avoid all honest work.
Beguiled by government largesse
he spent his time in playing chess,
and learned the game so well that he
soon gained complete proficiency.
He entered tournaments galore
and soon built up a mighty store
of prize money that made him rich.
(And still he never worked a stitch.)
Retired to a Swiss chalet
he whiles away each pleasant day
in teaching idle youth to play
the game of chess his winning way.
So there you have my moral tale;
I hope it wasn't very stale.
When all is over, said, and done,
just which of these two really won?
Thursday, January 24, 2019
The Speech That Wasn't Made
WASHINGTON—President Trump said late Wednesday that he wouldn’t deliver his State of the Union address until the government reopened, following days of high-profile squabbling after House Speaker Nancy Pelosi urged the president last week to delay his speech.
WSJ
Donald Trump has now become a name that will not fade
from history in tribute to the speech he never made.
He had his notes and prompt book and was ready to convey
to Congress and the people his amazing cabaret.
But suddenly Pelosi slammed the door right in his face,
and Trump no longer had his presidential gabbing place.
He thought he might try Central Park, or Disneyland instead;
he even thought it could be done from Lincoln's White House bed.
At last he gave it up as just another left wing ruse
to keep the country uninformed and issues to confuse.
Then speculation grew as to what was in his postponed speech;
would IT have made the Democrats collapse without a screech?
Big Pharma thought he would complain about the price of drugs.
Labor was as certain that he'd call them dirty thugs.
Wall Street knew deep in their bones that Trump would not gainsay
the reckoning to come to them upon the Judgment Day.
Trump refused to say a word about his canceled speech.
And so the innuendos grew as strong as Clorox bleach.
He'd give Green Cards to refugees who paid beneath the table;
he wanted to give Kim Jong-un a beautiful fur sable.
Putin would become an honorary Eagle Scout;
Robert Mueller was demoted to a Brussels sprout;
Ivanka was appointed the Ambassador to Spain;
Mitch McConnell would be granted funds to find a brain.
Global warming was outlawed as terroristic thinking;
polar icecaps were too big and needed modest shrinking.
We'd be invading Canada, as soon as it stopped snowing.
And NATO could just hit the road, their soldiers take up sewing.
The commentary on Trump's speech that never would be given
caused an uproar coast to coast and left the country riven.
In panic whole communities fled to the isle of Fiji,
while billionaires wiped windshields with a tattered filthy squeegee.
The Pentagon decided to go in for renovation,
becoming a large shopping mall and Conoco gas station.
Women marched on Nordstrom stores and caravans of kitties
infiltrated Instagram and set up large committees.
The speech Trump never gave was soon so infamous that he
was taken out of office and sent to a nunnery.
And that is why his name is used to frighten little nippers
and as a cuss word when adults get fingers caught in zippers.
Wednesday, January 23, 2019
Hoarding Birds: A Felony
Dozens of birds were rescued from a possible hoarding situation in a Rancho Bernardo apartment on Wednesday morning, a San Diego Humane Society official said.
A handful of Humane Society officers spent hours removing the birds from a home on Avenida De Los Lobos near Paseo Montanoso, placing them in boxes and then carting them out to a truck to be medically evaluated, according to the Humane Society.
As of 2 p.m., more than 80 birds had been seized.
It’s unclear what types of birds were located, but many were cockatiels, a member of the cockatoo family, officials said. The animals will eventually be transported to the shelter on Gaines Street.
San Diego officers with assistance from the Psychiatric Emergency Response Team also responded to the apartment to evaluate a resident there, police said.
LATimes. @LAWinkley
Hoarding birds; a felony
except upon the Bering Sea,
where sailors capture them for heat
against the cold and mist and sleet.
In other places, not too cool;
birds, too, need the Golden Rule.
Hoard not, or you'll hoarded be
whether bird or timpani.
After all, a bunch of drums
is not like a vase of mums;
no one cares if flowers bloom
all around the living room.
Kinda two-faced, after all --
why can't birds be wall to wall?
Maybe such propinquity
is their pickin' cup of tea!
Is this fake news once again,
written by a hacker's pen?
Birds, I bet, are very keen
to be packed in like sardine.
Holy Hannah! I declare;
this bird story isn't fair.
Feathered friends should sue the Times
for such libel and high crimes.
The Constitution guarantees
I can hoard both birds and bees.
What I want to know right now:
where have those drums gone, anyhow?
*********************************
Still Lives
Revere Clinic. 2019.
Revere Clinic. 2019.
Revere Clinic. 2019.
Abandoned License Plate. Provo Utah. 2019.
Deseret Industries. Provo. 2019.
Deseret Industries. Provo. 2019.
Deseret Industries. Provo. 2019.
Deseret Industries. Provo. 2019.
Song of the Caravan
TECÚN UMÁN, Guatemala—A caravan of Central American migrants seeking to reach the U.S. is set to swell in coming days as thousands gather at Mexico’s southern border waiting for humanitarian visas that have become much easier to get under Mexico’s new government.
Around 5,600 Central Americans are awaiting visas at Tecún Umán, on Guatemala’s border with Mexico, Mexican officials said Tuesday. The visas would allow them to continue their journey north without the risk of deportation from Mexico.
WSJ @jmontesWSJ
Afoot and determined, we take to the road;
these wide brown approaches to our new abode.
We've heard that fresh visas in Mexico will
give us free passageway up and down hill.
Good fortune is gone from our poor native soil;
the government plots all our dreams to despoil.
Our children as soldiers or young racketeers?
Better we all should break through new frontiers!
We're done with the groveling life of a pawn,
so wear out our sandals to find a clear dawn.
The stars up above testify that our aims
are not addlepated or frivolous games.
We hear that the Hefe up North has decreed
he doesn't want us or our hardworking breed;
he's building a wall that he thinks will prevent
asylum for us without his mean consent.
We also have heard, though it's hard to believe,
he separates fam'lies without a reprieve.
Children are taken from parents by force,
imprisoned and fed only food that is coarse.
But even if true, we are coming his way.
We're using our feet to create a new day;
our numbers increasing, we ask but a chance
to see that our children can thrive and advance.
We carry no weapons, our shield is the hope
that we will find friends who will help us to cope.
Americans, look upon us and construe
that there but for God's grace goes your journey too!
*********************
Tim Torkildson
torkythai911@gmail.com
Available for birthday parties and Rotary Club luncheons
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