Friday, August 17, 2018

Prospering continually




And now there was nothing in all the land to hinder the people from prospering continually, except they should fall into transgression. 3 Nephi. Chapter 6. Verse 5.

To prosper without money is my goal in life today;
To feel the richness of the earth because I do obey
the laws of God and wisdom while I struggle here below
to bury greed and bigotry, and let my spirit grow.
It takes but very little all my wants to satisfy;
and so I feel most prosperous as my brief days go by.


Thursday, August 16, 2018

Is Coffee a Health Benefit or a Poison?



In March, Judge Berle ruled that coffee had to come with cancer warnings, and the coffee companies geared up for years of appeals. But in June, the World Health Organization concluded that there was “inadequate evidence” that drinking coffee caused cancer, reinforcing earlier findings by a panel of experts.  NYT.
Is coffee any good for you,
or with your body does it screw?
If you are Mormon then you know
it's devil's brew, from down below.
But when a deadline looms today,
"Make it large and black" we say.
I think they ought to mark it thus:
"The price would cause a Saint to cuss."

When taxes give reporters bread





When taxes give reporters bread,
objectivity is dead;
writers then are maleable
to opinions fallible.
Starving journalists do mean
that their consciences are clean.



Wednesday, August 15, 2018

From John Schwartz -- Jennifer Bendery -- Donald Trump



Before long, looks like we'll be asking who DIDN'T tape Trump. @jswatz


An audiophile from Kankakee
recorded politicians, see?
He didn't tell a single soul
about his documenting role.
So now he has a book of quotes
that brings him large and green banknotes.



Surely there will be a mass wave of denunciations from Republicans in response to their party leader referring to a woman of color as a dog. @jbendery

Referring to women as dogs
is something that surely befogs
the gender debate
with fear and with hate --
and makes of supporters fat hogs.



Fired FBI Agent Peter Strzok is a fraud, as is the rigged investigation he started. There was no Collusion or Obstruction with Russia, and everybody, including the Democrats, know it. The only Collusion and Obstruction was by Crooked Hillary, the Democrats and the DNC! @realDonaldTrump

Hillary Clinton is crafty;
her alibis always are drafty.
The Democrats, too,
are like a corkscrew --
and Peter Strzok is a daftie!


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Our Country was built on Tariffs, and Tariffs are now leading us to great new Trade Deals - as opposed to the horrible and unfair Trade Deals that I inherited as your President. Other Countries should not be allowed to come in and steal the wealth of our great U.S.A. No longer! @realDonaldTrump

My Tariffs make Uncle Sam strong;
Obama had got it all wrong.
Nobody should steal
from our commonweal --
except my Republican throng.


Tuesday, August 14, 2018

A Crazed Crying Lowlife

When you give a crazed, crying lowlife a break, and give her a job at the White House, I guess it just didn’t work out. Good work by General Kelly for quickly firing that dog! @realDonaldTrump


The lowlife dogs that hang around the White House nowadays
are looking for a handout and a bit of fulsome praise.
They're such a nuisance that I've called exterminators for
clearing them from woodwork and the carpets on the floor.
Treat a cur too kindly and they simply bite your hand;
Who said "Get a mirror?" I will have their bottoms tanned!


Monday, August 13, 2018

Wacky Omarosa



Wacky Omarosa, who got fired 3 times on the Apprentice, now got fired for the last time. She never made it, never will. She begged me for a job, tears in her eyes, I said Ok. People in the White House hated her. She was vicious, but not smart. I would rarely see her but heard....
...really bad things. Nasty to people & would constantly miss meetings & work. When Gen. Kelly came on board he told me she was a loser & nothing but problems. I told him to try working it out, if possible, because she only said GREAT things about me - until she got fired! @realDonaldTrump


Wacky Omarosa did the dirt to me and mine.
She begged me for employment, promising to stay in line.
I gave her such a good job that it made her cocky, so
my staff of her was jealous and made her feel like guano.
She missed most of her meetings and was tardy all the time;
she started treating me as if I'd done some awful crime.
Even tough guy Kelly couldn't bring her up to scratch,
and so I had to dump her as a terrible mismatch.
 And now she's wrote a crummy book that revels in its lies;
if slander were much honored she would win the Nobel Prize!


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Trump gets loud ovation while criticizing media during speech to troops at Fort Drum, N.Y. @DavidNakamura

If you want a good lynching mob,
abusing the press does the job.
You'll be a hero
although you're a zero --
emerging an eagle from squab.


Sunday, August 12, 2018

The Tweets of Trump



“Seems like the Department of Justice (and FBI) had a program to keep Donald Trump from becoming President”. If this had happened to the other side, everybody involved would be in jail. This is a Media coverup of the biggest story of our time. @realDonaldTrump


The intrigues against me are rife.
But I am immune to the strife.
Though writers attempt
to show me contempt
I'll have an extended shelf life!


Peace, peace be unto you



Peace, peace be unto you, because of your faith in my Well Beloved, who was from the foundation of the world. Helaman 5. Verse 47.

I carry peace inside of me.
And so do you.
It is put there by the Savior.
As like the dew.
A birthright too few keep intact.
But rather spew.
But it can be regained again.
And be brand new.
Such love and mercy I adore.
And so do you.


Saturday, August 11, 2018

The Tweets of Trump



I am proud to have fought for and secured the LOWEST African American and Hispanic unemployment rates in history. Now I’m pushing for prison reform to give people who have paid their debt to society a second chance. I will never stop fighting for ALL Americans! @realDonaldTrump


Minorities know I am right
when I say for them that I fight;
their cause is secure
since I never blur
their needs with a prying klieg light.

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I've got a little secret that I do not want to tell
about a certain President who likes to stomp and yell.
I won't reveal my secret if I'm treated with respect
and can a tidy sum of spondulicks slyly collect. 
The White House has deep pockets and can well afford my fee;

I'm sure there's boilerplate to sign for Trump's adultery. 


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Hundreds of Bikers for Trump just joined me at Bedminster. Quite a scene - great people who truly love our Country! @realDonaldTrump

When Bikers for Trump are in town,
how likely that things will burn down?
Or beer bottles fly
as these lowbrows try
to safeguard their favorite clown.

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Mr. Trump’s attacks—from dismissing critical stories as “fake news” to painting news organizations as “the enemy of the people”—play well with his supporters. An Ipsos poll published this week showed that 43% of Republicans who responded said they agreed the president should be able to close news outlets “engaged in bad behavior.”   WSJ


There once was a writer named Brad
who seemed to behave very bad
by sticking to fact
without too much tact --
his newspaper's now a scratch pad.

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The rally calls for the opinion writers that staff newspaper editorial boards to produce independent opinion pieces about Trump’s attacks on the media. So far, according to the Associated Press, 70 news organizations have agreed — from large metropolitan daily newspapers such as the Miami Herald and Denver Post to small weekly newspapers with four-digit circulation numbers.
WSJ


The Fourth Estate finally wakes
now that Trump's playing high stakes.
He never has learned
you always get burned
when treating the press as just flakes.



Friday, August 10, 2018

No Comment




It's official: Friday 10th of August single hardest day to get any single quote for a story. @LexyTopping (Reporter at The Guardian)


When your phone calls ain't returned.
When your queries all are spurned.
What can a reporter write
that will not seem filled with spite?
Go and find another source
(somewhere on a nice golf course.)


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