Those who push Saint Valentine
Should be plunged in boiling brine.
Wretches who give choc’late boxes
Should be chained to rabid foxes.
Libertines who mail out hearts
Deserve a rain of fiery darts.
And caitiffs who go out on dates
Deserve the very worst of fates --
Flood and famine, emerods,
Killer whales in swarming pods.
Thus old bachelors agree --
It’s just a day of infamy!
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