Monday, May 15, 2023

An email to Nathan Draper. Monday, May 15. 2023.

 


yes, this email is composed only for you and sent only to you.
because i miss the days when i would spend a leisurely afternoon on my typewriter composing letters to friends.  many of them dead now, like tim holst (who baptized me) and kevin bickford, a.k.a. rufus t. goofus (who once threw me into the hippo's wading pool.)  so many others i have lost track of like peter willden and bart seliger and michael nebeker and elder day (my comp at the LTM in hawaii -- i can't even remember his first name now.  but when we were comps in thailand for a few weeks when i was touring doing grade school clown shoes he got really bored and kinda resentful that we weren't doing any regular missionary work so at the end of one of my shows he pied me with a shaving cream pie. it got a big laugh and he thought we should include it in all my shows but i told him no thanks.)
by the way, this looks to be a long string of drool, so i will break it up with lines of asterisks so you can stomach it easier. just read one section at a time. then take a break to go get some som tum or take a nap. then come back for the next section.  on the other hand, i only had five hours of sleep last night and i may nod off at any minute here. so there won't be anymore to read.  i'm just waiting for amy to finish the laundry here at her sister's house in idaho before we go into town to the dollar store to get a shower curtain and sardines.  if they don't have any sardines i'm going to make amy stop at the arctic circle burger for an order of french fries for my lunch.
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Idaho is a state of mind -- that's why it needs a psychiatrist.
hmmm.  that needs work.  let's try another one:
Minnesota is the land of ten thousand lakes and ten million bait shops.
naw, not very good.  dump it.
Utah has the greatest snow on earth -- but the worst drivers on the freeways.
decent. i like it.
i should write a haiku about writing emails:

the cursor highlights
how impersonal we get
with our blinking words.

not too shabby. think I'll copy it to put on facebook and my twitter account.
amy wants me to change my shirt so she can wash it.  this is important to write down because why?  because i once again have someone in my life who cares about how i look (and smell.)   going without that kind of person for 26 years was depressing.
unlike writing a personal letter, writing a personal email means the content is liable to be shared with everyone and their dog at some time in the future. so i have to be careful what i say about the people around me, cuz there's a chance they may read it.  with a personal letter, once you sealed it and mailed it it was just between you and the person you sent it to.  unless they chose to share it with others.
i wish i had saved the thousands of letters i received over the years from friends and family.  i still have a sack full of postcards from my kids while i was out of their lives. but otherwise i threw away beautiful letters from old clown friends and missionary companions and old girlfriends and my old minneapolis pals who knew me when i first joined the church.  i'm going to be leaving very little of anything behind when i pass on.  nothing of material value except an insurance policy for amy.  and all the stuff i've written.  which i suspect won't matter an iota to any of my kids. but i've said that before.  who cares?  i hope to be so busy in the next life that i'll forget my obsession with fame in this world.
i wonder if famous people in this world are still famous in the next?  did lincoln meet with a standing ovation when he crossed over?  what happened with hitler?  or charlie chaplin?
all i know for sure is that when i get over there i'll see my little boy Irvin.
the wind is always blowing here in idaho.  it stunts the lilac bushes, which are no higher than your knee. the wind carries odors a long way.  i can smell the water treatment plant five miles away, and the cheese factory just outside of Rupert.
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in May the roadkill

attracts fell things of the night --

unhealthy to meet.


we saw a lot of roadkill on the way to Buhl this morning for ice cream. their creamery is superb. we got killer chocolate and lemon curd. now that we're back at the house we'll probably take a nap and then drive over to Twin Falls to eat at a curry house that specializes in lamb dishes. but if you get there after 6 p.m. they're usually out of lamb and you have to settle for chicken or paneer.
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Well, my fine feathered friend, you're in luck.  i seem to be coming down with something.  my throat is on fire and i can barely see straight.  hope it's just a throat infection and not that blankity-blank covid.  anywho, i shall end my email here for the nonce so i can go spray my throat with otc Phenol and gulp more aspirin.  i only ate a third of my curry, which is a sure sign with me that i'm ill.  i'll try to choke down some Buhl ice cream to keep my throat soothed and then sit in my La-z-Boy for the rest of the day and night and dream of winning the nobel prize in literature for my haiku.
toodles, tt.


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