Thursday, November 24, 2022

Allison Prang -- A Reporter Who Follows the Money.

 If you have money; if you want money; if you steal money -- you need to read Allison Prang's journalistic essays on the subject of cash, specie, legal tender, gelt. Having cut her teeth writing for Thompson's Bank Note Reporter in Manhattan, she knows her greenbacks.

While studying at the University of Missouri Ms. Prang developed a sixth sense about squeezing blood from turnips. Which she then sold to plasma centers to finance her education. When she graduated with a journalism degree she was immediately hired by the Charleston Post & Courier newspaper. Her advice column, entitled "Scrooge was a Wimp!", guided strapped consumers on stretching their dollars like taffy. Her recipe for Salt & Pepper Soup instantly became a thrift classic, and is now extensively served in public schools and federal prisons. 

At the Wall Street Journal Ms. Prang specializes in broken news. Whenever a story falls apart, she is called in with her pot of library paste to reassemble stray facts and figures back into a compelling narrative. Her expertise in this area has been recognized by the Heinie Manush Foundation, which recently presented her with a frozen turkey. Giblets included.

Her advice to nascent journalists is: "Castigat ridendo mores." 

She is a big fan of Major League Pickleball, and recently purchased a controlling interest in the Florida Smash.

She is currently reading Judge Judy's "Don't Pee on My Leg and Tell Me it's Raining!"

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