Al Franken Announces He Plans to Resign
There was a young Senator, Al,
Who flirted with many a gal.
His boisterous fun
This moment has won
For him an unseated locale.
Is It Time for Teddy to Go? Better Call a Stuffed-Animal Exterminator
If you have a bear that’s stuffed
And want to have it quickly snuffed
Just call a teddy hatchet man
Who’ll dump ‘em in a mute trash can.
They take out bunnies and plush mutts;
But they don’t work for just peanuts.
So giving unicorns the boot
Is gonna cost you lots of loot.
Full of germs and allergens,
Stuffed toys are too hard to cleanse.
Better kids should ask Saint Nick
For Barbie dolls and pogo stick.
Hackers Steal $70 Million in Bitcoin
Such slippery treasures just prove
That wealth is a pawn to remove
From this place to that --
It’s really old hat;
As ancient as Minoan groove.
In Norway, Fighting the Culling of Reindeer With a Macabre Display of a Curtain of Skulls
Displaying of dry reindeer skulls
To protest continuing culls
Is not very smart --
Twould be better art
Displaying the lawmaker’s hulls.
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