Private Charitable Foundations Give Lavish Rewards to Insiders

A mutual-fund manager earned nearly $5 million

over eight years from a lucrative side gig. He

was trustee of his business partner’s private

charitable foundation. Another charitable foundation,

set up by a carpet merchant, has millions of dollars

in loans outstanding to the man’s carpet company.

A third paid out more to companies owned by the

foundation president’s family than it gave to charity

in a recent year.   WSJ

I dropped a coin into the cup of some poor soul today,

Standing on the corner like a pitiful old stray.

And straight away a fellow in Italian silk appeared.

“Don’t be a fool!” he said to me. “You’re acting mighty weird!”

He grabbed me by the arm and led me to a coffee shop,

And there he told me private charity was such a flop.

“The poor do not appreciate the finer things in life”

He said while spreading marmalade on muffins with a knife.

He then explained that charity is just another name

For gouging money from the suckers, like a carny game.

“I set up an endowment for some trendy thing” he crowed,

“And you should see the shekels that come in by the carload!”

“Once I have a bundle I begin to loan it out,

Or buy a hundred acres with a stream that’s full of trout.

I get away with murder cuz the tax laws are inept;

So if you are nonprofit, then the books are barely kept.”

“My brother takes a large slice, as a consultation fee;

My sister gets a hunk for serving us warm herbal tea.

And if there’s any leftovers, or crumbs we do not need,

We give it to somebody who has got a good newsfeed.”

My eyes were opened by this man’s approach to giving alms,

And I intend to get donations in my sticky palms.

For charity begins at home, but once you think expansion

Then you can keep on stealing till you’ve got yourself a mansion!