From Newsweek
The Swedes could not digest the fact that meatballs with their name
Were from a foreign nation -- it did fill them with great shame.
And so, as is the custom when a country gets too sore,
They took it out on Turkey by declaring it was war!
Their aircraft flew to Istanbul and formed a fearsome string
Of bombing raids in which they dropped the dreaded surstromming.
In retaliation the bold Turks began to lob
Ballistic missiles made up of their toothsome shish-kabob.
Other countries then took sides, to turn this food-borne spree
Into what can only be described as World War Three.
Italy dropped pasta on the Chinese countryside
(because the Chinese said that noodles were their ancient pride.)
France had sommeliers burst forth in suicidal sally
To put a stop to upstarts in the fruitful Napa Valley.
The Fenians refused to export any Irish stew
(a blow to England where cuisine all tastes like Elmer’s Glue.)
Fufu flung with fiendish glee; gefilte fish let loose;
This bellicose reaction meant we cooked our own sweet goose.
Cuz when the war was over and we sent home the Marines,
There wasn’t anything to eat except canned pork and beans.
So now the world’s quiescent, and the nations are at peace.
The only form of currency we use is bacon grease.
A loaf of bread, a jug of wine, and maybe some pate,
Is all that we can dream about along our famished way . . .
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