My friends will forgive me when foolish I act/My lust for the spotlight still leaves me no tact/Absolve me, my dear hearts, and let folly slide/if I have embarrassed you with my ill pride.
Ears are prone
to itch for praise
so tell your boss
she needs a raise.
If you want
a long long life
never march to
drum and fife.
Stomach rumbles
do remind
that to my flesh
I must be kind.
Ham and eggs
are good for me;
just don't ask an
actuary.
Buttered toast
is very well
but it plays hob
with my lapel.
Why get up
if you can't sleep?
Work from bed
by shearing sheep.
What resembles
pork and beans?
The content of
most magazines.
No use praying
for clean air
when you car's
in disrepair.
Candidates say
little of note.
They always find
tripe gets the vote.
Got a call
from Kolkata --
said they were
my alma mata.
Made donation --
now I'm busted.
Goes to show
phones can't be trusted.
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