Wednesday, January 3, 2018

Ledes & Limericks. Wednesday January 3 2018




Kim Jong Un Says He Has a Nuclear

Launch Button on His Office Desk

There once was a nutty old fake
Who blew up the world by mistake.
He buzzed for his tea,
But the button, you see,
Sent missiles the US to bake.


With the collapse of the Greek economy and unemployment at 21%,
pensioners are providing the main source of income for half the people
in the country. Some Greeks are even yanking their elders out of nursing homes
so they can make use of pension payments that would otherwise flow to the caretakers.  
From the Wall Street Journal


There once was an elderly Greek
Who lived in a nursing home bleak.
His kids had him yanked
To have his funds banked
For them to help run a boutique.


The Vandal and the Mosque:

A New Chapter of Forgiveness

in Arkansas



@stavernise

Forgiveness -- a wonderful word!
To shun it would be too absurd.
When offered, twill bless
Ev’ryone -- more or less;
It should be our planet’s watchword.


Investigative journalism is not dead.

Ask Roy Moore and John Conyers.  From the Washington Post

@callumborchers

Though fake news continues to rise/Before reader’s wondering eyes/The writers who snoop/

To bring us real poop/Are still our most loyal allies.




I’m Taking a Cigar Break. See You in Three Hours, 26 Seconds


@CharlesPassy

There was a young man from Pine Bluff
Who on a cigar took a puff.
He could not discern
How someone could yearn
For anything tasting so rough.


Powerful yet addicted to power:

Why the New York Times is in the hot seat so often

@Sulliview


The paper of record regrets
Nothing it ever begets.
A fact may not check
But, hey, what the heck --
We’re busy protecting assets.


Washington Attorney General Sues
Motel 6 for Sharing Guest Info With Feds

After long and weary miles, while driving through the sticks,
It’s nice to find a motor court like good ol’ Motel Six.
The sheets are clean, the shower’s hot, the clerk’s a pleasant guy --
Who also works for Uncle Sam as immigration spy.

So if you sign in as Gomez or Sancho or Patel
You might have agents coming for you at that darn motel.
They’ll want to see some evidence that you are kosher, see?
And then they’ll let you go back to Black Mirror on TV.

But if you cannot show them you belong here in the States
They’ll lodge you absolutely free behind some prison gates.
Then after you have suffered from the bedbugs and the ticks
They’ll take you far away from any good ol’ Motel Six . . .



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