The story of a lie.

 

When you tell yourself a lie or let others sell you a lie about yourself, the results are inevitably sad and damaging.

A lie is something that won't let you love yourself or trust yourself enough to let go of the false to embrace the truth.

The Savior saw much of this during his ministry, and in his dealings with the prophets past and present.

I am fortunate to have recently been reunited with a woman who knows the power of lies in her own personal life, has fought them, and has come out on top of them, banishing them to permanent non-existence.

With her blessed help I am overcoming the lies in my life.

In my life I have struggled with many lies, which have led to devastatingly poor choices.

Such as alcoholism.

The lie, for me, began with seeing alcohol as a magical elixir -- something that could make Dumbo fly and reunite him with his mother and make him a circus celebrity.

John Wayne could down a bottle of whisky, win a bar fight, and then ride off into the sage with head held high and no hint of a hangover.

That lie was what I was looking for as a kid, since I felt ignored, untalented, and insignificant. 

So when I turned fourteen I embraced the lie and began drinking. Since I couldn't love me, I could love the bottle and what it did for me and to me.

I could be a great lover; give others fantastic financial advice; beat up a cadre of bullies; and perform on stage to thunderous applause.

In my mind I could do all that. In reality I could only pee my pants and throw up.

Today, as my body dries out and my spirit grows full, I walk with the Savior, imagining how he will befriend me and counsel me.  He talks but little, saying to me only "There are better things ahead for you."

And the lie wilts and dies a quiet death.