I've never run for office in my life, so I'm an expert on the process. the first thing you do is sign up a bunch of like-minded people to hurry around a rented office with lots of papers in their hands. you must have dozens of constantly ringing phones in the office, with your subordinates rushing to answer them like it was the end of the world. that's the way I've seen it done in the movies.
then you gotta stand in front of a giant photograph of yourself looking all pompous and important and declaim something generic and easy to chant, like "Better Politics Means Better Lives!"
I think that's all there is to it. I might have missed something, but if I did it can't be very important. these are the main points.
if you happen to get elected you can expect a beautiful woman, or a handsome man, to complicate things for you -- but the real person to look out for is the cigar chomping fat cat who drips money out of his bulging pockets. he is what is known as a Vested Interest. keep him at arm's length. you should spend all your time working for the Little People. and I do mean leprechauns -- there's no strings attached to their gold, chum.
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