I went to bed so stuffed with bird
my stomach howled, my vision blurred.
The pumpkin pie at last was gone,
the mashed potatoes had been drawn;
the cranberries were in the freezer --
the rolls were crumbs (you'd need a tweezer.)
But still the turkey meat was heaped
in quarts of gravy richly steeped.
I knew tomorrow's turkey medley
would prove loathsome, if not deadly!
I counted turkeys, and not sheep,
to try to get a bit of sleep.
At last I dreamed of turkey slices
used in pagan sacrifices.
Turkey wings were boomerangs;
dread vampires had wishbone fangs.
And then environmental chiefs
used turkey breasts for coral reefs.
The drumsticks turned to war clubs as
the peaceniks used them to play jazz.
Churches all built of turkey necks --
where dieting paid last respects.
When I awoke I had to fix
Alka Seltzer for inner bricks.
That's when I vowed that come what may
I'll be vegan next Turkey Day!
No comments:
Post a Comment