I was enjoying myself at the arboretum, when all of a sudden the sprinklers were turned on -- with a vengeance! I mean, they were like fire hoses. I was knocked off my feet into the nasturtiums, my elbows and knees scrapped a bloody red. an elderly couple nearby were hurled into the duck pond and nearly suffocated when they swallowed some lily pads. to make matters worse the overhead sprinklers came on as well, so everyone inside the arboretum began to drown. the water came down in shoals, in tidal waves, in green thick sheets. what finally saved us all was the Saint Bernard dog that came barging through the emergency exit, dragging us out to safety one by one. without that brave creature we would all would have gone to our watery grave.
when I gave the police my statement afterwards they were immediately skeptical. they asked me if I had been drinking. was I taking any recreational drugs at the time. could I locate a witness to verify my statements. that kind of thing. when I became indignant they hustled me into a black van in handcuffs.
"where are you taking me?" I cried in surprise and terror.
"to China" replied one of the cops. "they might swallow such fairy tales, but we sure don't here."
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