I saw a fair haired man at the market, glaring at the apples. he was muttering to himself and then he started to shake his fist at the bin of apples.
"Pardon me" I said to him, "I am a psychiatrist and I am wondering why you seem so upset with these apples." I'm actually a veterinarian, but since my practice failed I have passed myself off as many things, including a retired astronaut and a symphony orchestra conductor. it keeps me from stepping on turtles in a rage.
the fair haired man gave me a wild look, stepped close to me, and said "them apples is plotting against me. they have a shifty look about their stems, and I don't trust the way they are displayed. will you help me bring them to justice?"
I immediately said I would help him. because apples are getting too good of a reputation on social media -- it must be fake news put there by a foreign power bent on our destruction. apples need to be taken down a peg. I hear the mayor of Baltimore is an apple.
after we were jailed, he and I agreed that the system is rigged and that the only way a man can get any justice nowadays is to pretend to go along with the apple crowd. but our day will come . . .
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