I was bothered by muckleheads in the winter and punkies in the summer, so I decided to move. I chose a neighborhood where the fire hydrants were all painted to look like garden gnomes. my realtor, Anne, showed me several homes in the area, but none of them were quite what I wanted. Anne became a little frustrated. "just exactly what are you looking for in your new home?" she asked me pointedly. "well" I said, "outside of the garden gnome hydrants, I want a place that makes me feel it is swell with my soul. plus a double garage." "Okay" she replied. "I think I have just the place for you." we drove down a street shaded by elms to a house on a corner lot, surrounded by a white picket fence. a wonderful place, I could tell even before going inside. I told Anne she was a genius -- this was the house I wanted. when we got inside she marched into the kitchen, where a family sat at lunch, and told them to leave immediately -- their house was sold. "but we aren't selling our beautiful house" said the father. "it's heaven on earth." Anne pulled out a starter's pistol and began firing over their heads, until they had all jumped out the windows screaming and running away.
I felt bad for them, but I was able to move in that same week. and Anne filled the double garage with real garden gnomes for me. she is worth every cent of her commission.
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