Another Theory About Conspiracy Theories

 

Another theory has it we are all bird droppings,

cast off by the legendary Roc

from the Arabian Nights,

which have come to life --

only the white part of the dropping

early on cheated the black part

of the dropping,

enslaving them forever.

So you've got to figure out if 

you're the pale part or the

dark part, and then act

accordingly.

But that's just so much pigeon wax,

according to the Marmalade Research Institute;

they insist that a cabal of displaced distillers

of rose water got together in the fourteenth

century to create the illusion of wealth

and breed a deep seated suspicion

of frivolity.

They succeeded so well that today

we are wealthier than anyone was

back in the fourteenth century,

and enjoy a better understanding

of frivolity.

We vote it into and out of office

on a regular basis.

But of course the Marmalade Institute

is riddled with crypto-arrivistes;

their secret agenda is to provide

wheat germ for the masses.

Me, I believe that all men are unbalanced

on an equal basis --

but that some are probably more 

balanced than others.

Like my ex brother-in-law who bought

us a chicken farm without

warning us about the feather lice.

He was loaded with that illusionary wealth.

And died just last week

because he didn't believe in wearing a mask.

He called it a conspiracy.

I call it karma.

. . . And the Roc just keeps 

pooping away.