Thursday, October 29, 2020

Today's timericks.

 



When it comes to speaking freely/heed the words of Horace Greely/He said "Speak your mind, young man/and have a paying bizness plan"/Zuckerberg and all his like/abuse free speech and riches strike.


the flood of falsehoods has begun/to see if Trump or Biden won/the tales they tell at county seats/all fairy tales it surely beats/and who's behind these fantasies?/perhaps it is the birds and bees . . . 


I live inside the Rust Belt/and I've heard it all before/the posturing and promises/that blossom nevermore/the landscape is depleted and the welfare checks are late/and I don't give a hoot in hell/for my own country's fate.


I'm growing old so gracefully/I'm like a stately oak/my acorns have all fallen/and my branches are quite broke/my bark is wrinkled from the years/my sap is rather thin/there's beetles boring into me/I'm rotten from within/O Axeman, when you get to me/be gentle and be quick/don't turn me into toothpicks/hanging from some low life's lip?



What the hell are all these ads about my Medicare?/are they information or just meant to throw a scare?/It's about Enrollment, or blue fairies, or the Sphinx/all I know about it is that something really stinks/tell Joe Namath to shut up and mind his own affairs/he couldn't sell a comb to people with the longest hairs.


Pandemic, won't you pretty please/spare the life of my rich cheese?/take away anchovy sauce/make french fries a total loss/but do not take away from me/my mozzarella and my brie/how can I endure a party/without some Swiss or smooth havarti?/I'll blow my brains out if I'm thrown/into a world sans provolone!


the yeasty smell of donuts/fried in grease and oh so sweet/what is there in all the world/such pleasure can unseat?/fie on custard bismarcks or the sticky maple bun/there is nothing to compare/ beneath the roaming sun/fill a bag for me and mine/and powder it with mace/and we will make them vanish/in a second, without trace!

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