Ev'rybody's getting frantic/seeing Google get gigantic/So an antitrust lawsuit/now is bearing awful fruit/But don't worry; Google will/simply buy up Capitol Hill.
Russian hackers in our hair/they are hacking ev'rywhere/In elections, power grids/even games for little kids/They are worse than in-law's snout/cuz you cannot kick them out/I guess I will go off-line/and mail letters asinine.
China has a new vaccine/doesn't work, but they are keen/to stick students on their way/to the good old USA/So if you begin to sneeze/blame those pushy darn Chinese.
Where ya gonna get the newz/now that newspapers do snooze/Partisans have set up press/to give you pure watercress/If you want the old reporting/Brit newspapers start importing.
Lawmakers are used to prying/barging in to start the frying/but the USPS keeps/them from any nosy peeps/They don't want the world to know/they invented the first 'slow.'
When my fingernails I paint/I know sanity is faint/next I'll dye my hair bright pink/and with kohl my eyes I'll ink/call them fashion trends, but we/really know they're lunacy.
If you really want to learn/why our diplomats all yearn/to return back home right quick/it's because they're getting sick/foreign poisons introduced/to give terrorists a boost/Envoys better watch their step/or they'll get a super strep!
If you're sitting on the fence/you don't have a good defence/You are wishy washy, mate/VOTE, and don't procrastinate/VOTE: your wooden fence this winter/will but give you a large splinter!
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