Wednesday, October 21, 2020

Today's Timericks. (Dedicated to the memory of Kevin Bickford.)

 





I gotta have more vitamins; I'm feeling mighty poor/I'll gulp 'em all, from A to Z, my sparkle to restore/I'd rather have a vitamin than hamburger and fries/so I can live to see another COVID-lit sunrise.



The President wants Biden tarred and feathered right away/and so he's pushing Barr to find the means and nasty way/to indict the candidate and sling a little crap/hoping some will stick so Biden loses in a snap.


I'm lovin' all my neighbors, no matter how they vote/After the election, I'll neither sulk nor gloat/I value their affection, and hope they feel the same/Together we will work hard the Canadians to blame.



Mitch McConnell is so mean/he'd step on a jelly bean/He's so stingy that he'd vote/Noah be denied raincoat/Something soured him for good/his heart is made up of driftwood.  



Now I hear that belching cows/cause the atmosphere to rouse/and that feedlots with their stink/put us on a climate brink/Let's raise crickets now instead/so we don't all wind up dead. 



It ain't a good idear, my friend/an interview to rudely end/when it is Sixty Minutes that/you treat like loathsome forest scat/Trump's wits sure have gone AWOL/when he disses Lesley Stahl. 


In the green state Tennessee/voting is sheer lunacy/If you wear the wrong t-shirt/you are treated just like dirt/Better cast your ballot nude/so the judges won't be rude.



The wide open spaces are calling to me/Escaping the virus is priority/I figure those cowpokes in Bozeman don't cotton/to anything that makes a body feel rotten/I'll buy me a ranch and raise sagebrush, you bet/riding the range on my trusty baguette.  


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